A Promise Made
by Songkit
Summary: When Kariya Matou is reincarnated in Kobato's world, he struggles to remember a painful past life as Kobato tries to heal his wounded heart.


A Promise Made…

_Kariya Matou's Afterstory_

_Part One: The Most Wounded Heart_

Chapter One: "I Promised"

_It's okay…_

_ We're going home now…_

_ I promised…_

Then there was nothing but darkness and agony. Oppressive, writhing, suffocating darkness. The little boy screamed and struggled. "Sakura!" he shrieked, "Sakura!"

There was a hand shaking his shoulder and hard, cold stone beneath his back, but he continued to writhe, smashing his head against stone. Was he still screaming? He felt his mouth stretched open and a scream tearing at his throat, but he couldn't hear himself.

His head struck against something soft, which had come between it and the concrete. There was a gentle grunt of pain from above him—a girl's voice.

"Sakura—" he gasped, his eyes snapping open.

Leaning over him was the face of a girl with large, brown eyes and pinkish-brown hair. Shadows fell across her features, which were scrunched up in a look of intense concern. "Are you all right?" she cried, "What's the matter?"

The boy was still now, breathing heavily. "Can't remember…" he mumbled. The nightmare had already faded away, leaving only a horrible, sick feeling in his gut and a single phrase echoing in his head: _I promised…_ He said it aloud.

The girl blinked, tilting her head to one side curiously, her eyes wide and glowing in this shadowed place. "Promise?"

Instead of replying, the little boy looked around, trying to understand where he was. The first sight that met his eyes was a crumpled juice carton, lying on its side on the concrete. Other trash was scattered around, and tall buildings rose up on either side, blocking out most of the sunlight, which flashed painfully in his eyes when he glanced toward the sky. Slowly, he sat up and leaned against the building, his head aching. Looking down, he saw that he was wearing a blue hoodie with silver stripes down the sleeves and black pants. "Where am I?" he mumbled.

"Mmmm…" The girl placed one finger on her cheek and looked to the side thoughtfully, her voice whistling like a wooden flute. At last, she closed her eyes and turned her face back to him with an apologetic smile. "We're in an alley," she replied.

The boy lowered his head and nodded, unsure what to say.

Brightening up, the girl introduced herself: "I'm Kobato Fujimoto! What's your name?"

"K…Ka…" The boy felt his cheeks redden with embarrassment, realizing he couldn't even remember his own name, He couldn't meet her eyes. What was happening? Why couldn't he remember anything?

"Kaede?" Kobato guessed, trying to be helpful, "Katsuro? Katashi?"

"Ka…riya," he mumbled at last, "I'm Kariya."

"Pleased to meet you, Kariya-kun!" Kobato said brightly.

"Mhm," Kariya replied, smiling a little in spite of himself. He was a bit shy, but she had a way of making him feel at ease, as though she was ready to accept and love him no matter what.

"Where do you life? We should try to find your family—I'm sure they miss you!"

"I…" Kariya faltered again. He thought hard, searching the darkness of his mind for some hint of family. The very word made his chest tighten, but he couldn't understand why. _Family…_

"I don't know," he muttered, grasping his left wrist and staring down at the crumpled carton.

There was a long silence. Finally, Kobato's gentle voice softened the tension: "I understand." Kariya looked at her again and found that she was gazing to the side as well, an expression of thoughtful sadness in her large, light brown eyes.

"What am I going to do?" he asked helplessly.

Abruptly, Kobato clenched her fists and stuck her face into his with an intensity that was alarming. Her eyebrows and the corners of her mouth turned down in an expression of pure determination. "You will come to live with us!" she declared.

"R-really?"

"Yes!" she gave a vigorous nod. "I lived in the park at first, but the Sayaka-sensei was so nice, she gave me my own apartment! I even got to sleep on a futon!" As she spoke, her expression melted into nostalgic delight.

Kariya couldn't help but giggle. "You mean you'll let me stay in your apartment for a little while? Is that okay?"

"Oh, but I don't live in the apartment anymore," Kobato clarified. Her pink cheeks turned even pinker, and a shy smile played about her lips. "I live in a very nice house now with Kiyokazu. That's why I'm Kobato Fujimoto now and not Kobato Hanato."

Again, Kariya couldn't find the words to say. Kobato stood up and pulled him to his feet as well. As he moved, he winced and touched the back of his head. His hair was wet and sticky. He brought his hand down and stared at it in shock. Blood. Now that he was aware of the injury, it began to throb and sting. He vaguely remembered struggling during the nightmare. Had he hurt himself then?

There was an alarmed exclamation from Kobato. "You're hurt!" she cried, "We need to take you to the doctor!"

"I'm all right," Kariya said. It wasn't that painful.

"No! We have to see the doctor!" she insisted," I know a very very kind doctor, and we're going to see him!" Before Kariya could argue, she spun on her heel and headed out from the alley. He didn't know what else to do but follow her.

"You don't have to worry, Kobato-chan, he's going to be fine," the young, ash-blonde doctor said optimistically, looking at Karya with gentle, gray eyes, "His injuries aren't serious." The boy sat on the edge of the exam room bed, staring around at the medical posters on the walls. One in particular made him flinch back: it was a diagram of tapeworm and hookworm and where they might invade the body. He looked away hurriedly.

"Thank you, Domoto-san!" Kobato cried, clasping her hands together and bowing quickly. Domoto chuckled and pulled on some vinyl gloves. He filled a basin with warm water and set it on the bedside table, dipping a fresh rag into it.

"I'm going to clean the back of your head now, okay?" he said.

Kariya gave a soft grunt of acknowledgement.

Wringing out the rag, Domoto tentatively touched it to the back of Kariya's head. When the boy didn't flinch, he began to clean the area with firmer strokes. Kariya watched Kobato while he waited. She was delicately built and much taller than him standing up, and her pale pink hair was so long! It almost reached to her ankles. She still seemed worried as she looked back at him, and he wondered why she cared so much. Even so, he liked her a lot. She reminded him of someone.

"Does is hurt?" came Domoto's voice from behind him.

Kariya looked at him and saw with surprise that his brows were knitted with concern. "It's not that bad," he replied.

"Is it numb? You haven't shown any sign of pain at all."

"It's not numb."

"Are you sure? If it's at all numb, I would want to give you a closer examination."

"It's not numb, really," Kariya insisted, wondering at the question, "It just doesn't hurt very bad."

"All right…" Domoto finished cleaning the wound and then patted the area dry. "You should be fine now," he said, patting the boy's shoulder, "It's just a few scratches that were bleeding a lot."

"Thank you, sir," Kariya replied. Slipping off the bed with a crackle of paper, he headed across the room to the sink. There was a mirror hanging above it, and Kariya examined himself curiously. His hair was black and tousled, and he had equally dark black eyes. The cheeks of his pale face were unusually sunken for a child. He had a somewhat flat nose and a sharp jaw. It wasn't a particularly nice-looking face, but it was honest. Since Kariya hardly even knew anything about himself at the moment, he was glad for that. It occurred to him that he didn't even know how old he was. Seven years, maybe? Eight?

"I'll need his surname for the medical records," Domoto was saying, "Do you know it?"

"No, I don't," Kobato replied, "Kariya-kun, what's your surname?"

Kariya turned to face her. "I don't know either," he replied. In truth, he hadn't even made an effort to remember his surname. He didn't really want to.

Domoto stared at him for a moment in astonishment, then quietly said to Kobato, "I might want to check for a concussion."

"I just want to go home," Kariya said abruptly.

"Do you remember where your home is now, Kariya-kun?" Kobato asked hopefully.

"No, I-I…" Kariya stammered, confused, "I'm just tired. I don't want to be here anymore." He turned to Domoto. "Please, sir, you said I wasn't badly hurt."

The doctor watched him for a moment, then he asked Kobato, "You and Kiyokazu-kun will be taking care of him for a while, right?"

"Right!" Kobato replied happily.

Domoto heaved a sigh. "All right, then. Just watch him, and if he gets dizzy or shows any other strange symptoms, bring him back here. For now, I don't know what could be causing the memory loss."

"Right! Watch for symptoms!" Kobato confirmed, intent and determined.

Domoto came and put his hand on Kariya's shoulder again. "You're a good boy," he said, "I hope you'll be able to remember everything soon."

For some reason, Kariya shivered. "I just hope I can be together with my family again," he replied.

Kobato's home was an aesthetic, yellow-brick mansion with many wood-framed windows, resting peacefully in the center of a pleasant glade just outside the city. The moment he entered the glade behind Kobato, Kariya was wrapped in a quiet happiness. This was a place of wishes come true, yet even being present here, he felt that it was just out of his reach. A little piece of his heart wept.

As they stepped into the sunlit main hall, Kobato began talking excitedly. "You must be very hungry, Kariya-kun! I'm going to make you something wonderful to eat. What would you like? I think I know how to stew hot pot, and Kiyokazu taught me how to make rice porridge! Oh, but—but if there's anything you'd really love to eat, I could make that too! Kobato is ready!"

Kariya giggled. "Anything's okay," he said.

"Mmmmm…Maybe I could ask Kiyokazu," Kobato mused.

"Ask me what?" came a gruff voice from the doorway. Then: "Wait—who's that?"

"Oh, Kiyokazu!" Kobato exclaimed delightedly, turning toward the man who had just entered. He was tall and lean, and he wore a neat, black and white suit and tie. His reddish-brown hair was wild around the top but tied neatly back in a long, thin ponytail. Rectangular spectacles caught the light behind his sharp, olive eyes, and he remained unsmiling as he glanced from Kariya to Kobato.

"This is Kariya-kun!" Kobato introduced the boy happily.

Kiyokazu Fujimoto heaved a sigh. "Where did you get him from? Kobato—"

"Well, I was going into town to buy groceries, when—" Kobato suddenlt let out a despairing cry. "Oh no, I forgot to buy groceries!"

The corner of Fujimoto's mouth twitched, but he folded his arms stoically and planted a glare on his face. "Never mind that. Get on with the story."

"Oh, well I heard crying from the alley," Kobato went on, gesturing frantically, "I went to see what was the matter, and it was this little, black-haired boy. He was sleeping, and he started screaming all of a sudden, so I ran to try to wake him, and he hit his head on the concrete, so I took him to see Domoto, and Domoto cleaned him up, and then we came back here!"

"Why didn't you take him back to his family? Wouldn't you think they might be worried about him?"

"That's just it…" Kobato said, her gaze dropping sadly, "He doesn't know where his family is."

As Kobato said this, Fujimoto's vexed gaze changed suddenly, his eyes widening with such empathy that Kariya could hardly believe this was the same man. Walking past Kobato, he knelt down to Kariya's level and simply said, "You can stay here as long as you need to."

"Thank you, Kiyokazu!" Kobato cried. As Fujimoto straightened up again, she flew to hug him from the side, pinning his arms. Smiling affectionately, he freed one hand and placed it on her head.

Kariya watched this with an odd, growing pain in his heart. Wanting to make the pain stop, he said, "Kobato-san was talking about, er, making dinner."

"You? Cook?" Fujimoto said, stepping back and raising one eyebrow skeptically.

"Ahhh! You're so mean!" Kobato complained, swaying to the side with comically exaggerated dejection.

In the end, Fujimoto went to make dinner while Kobato kept Kariya company in the living room. Kariya was quiet first, not really knowing what to say, but as Kobato chatted on about a preschool she had helped at and some blue stuffed dog toy named Ioryogi who was her friend, he started to open up a little more. Bu the time Fujimoto brought out the steaming platters of rice, stir-fry, and peanut-butter green beans, Kariya was laughing and talking about lighthearted subjects.

While they ate, Fujimoto talked about his day at work, and Kariya learned that he was a lawyer. Then they washed the dishes together. Once the chore was finished, Kobato caught Fujimoto by the arm and insisted that they show Kariya "their song"—_Ashita Kuru Hi_. Returning to the living room, the turned on a warm, orange lamp, since by then it was dark out. Near the corner of the living room, there was a brown, wooden grand piano that faced the open window. The stars were out, and cool, sweet air floated in. As Kariya snuggled into a soft chair that faced the piano, Fujimoto sat down on the bench, and Kobato stood by the window.

Slowly, Fujimoto picked out a few, gentle chords on the piano. Then he began to play a soft tune, as lovely as a music box. Kobato closed her eyes and joined in, singing in a high, childlike voice:

"In the spring, sakura blooms

In summer, the sky reaches far and wide,

Every time I think of these,

Precious thoughts spread across my heart,

Even on a rainy day,

Even those days we keep windows closed,

Light that shines and fills my heart,

Overflows from above the clouds

I hear a voice calling to me

From far, far away, it is calling my name,

It sounds like laughter,

Laughter and singing,

An echoing voice on the wind

Autumn rests beside the stream,

High in the treetops, the winter waits,

Deep and hidden in the world,

There is a kindness that knows no bounds

Every evening when I sleep,

I'll lift a prayer to God above,

So I'll know when morning comes,

I'll greet the new day with peace and love

In happiness and sorrow too,

In all that I live for and all I behold,

With my hand in yours, and,

Your hand in mine,

Together, we're one and a whole!"

Tears came to Kariya's eyes as he listened to this, and he let out a quiet sob, though Kobato and Fujimoto were too absorbed in the song to notice. By the time Kobato was done singing, however, he was smiling.

They stayed up a little longer, as Fujimoto read aloud a chapter from a novel. Then, Kobato took Kariya to the guest room. It was a very nice room with a large bed, spread with a light, blue-gray blanket. The blanket had a pattern of moons and stars on it. Exhausted, Kariya stumbled into bed, curled up under the covers, and said good-night.

However, after Kobato left, he wasn't able to fall asleep right away. Everything was too wonderful here. Smiling Kariya pulled the covers up to his chin and snuggled down deeper into the pillows. This was almost like having a family. He was so happy. It felt like he hadn't been this peaceful for a very long time.

Chapter Two: "I'll Kill You"

It was that darkness again.

Not a gentle darkness that enfolded and protected him, but a suffocating darkness that seemed to wrap around his throat and strangle him.

A toxic, green light flashed and vanished. Kariya screamed in horror. In that split-second, he had seen his blankets, but they were moving and pulsating like a mass of huge, squirming bugs. Now they didn't feel like blankets anymore; they were cold and wet, sliding across his skin in a million different directions. He began to thrash and cry, but then he felt one of the wet things at the corner of his mouth. He clamped his mouth shut in terror, but the thing kept pressing relentlessly at it, trying to pry apart his lips.

Then another of the things touched the corner of his left eye. Deliberately, it began to force his way inside, sending an unbearable pain shooting through his skull. When he opened his mouth to scream again, the thing at his lips immediately slipped in, falling straight to the back of his throat. Kariya choked and tried to cry out, tried to sit up, but he couldn't move.

His eyes snapped open. Where was he? It was dark. He had to get away. Still screaming, he scrambled out of bed and ran across the room, bursting through the door into the hallway where he stumbled and fell to his knees.

"Help help Sakura help!" His thin voice echoed as if from a distance. "Help! Help! Help…help…" Slowly, soft, pale moonlight faded into his vision, and his screaming died down. He fell silent, gasping, his hands and knees pressed against the carpet. No, wait…he was at home, right? He looked back toward the door. A shudder went through him. Again, the details of the nightmare had already blurred, and he only remembered the huge, wet creature falling into his mouth. That, and stark terror. Dread still pounded through his skull, making his arms and legs feel week.

Suddenly, the door at the end of the hallway exploded open, and Kobato flew at him, her fluffy, pink nightgown glowing in the moonlight. Before Kariya knew what was going on, she had wrapped him in a hug, pressing his face to her shoulder. He trembled and began to cry, clutching at her sleeve.

"What is it?" Kobato asked, her voice piping into the darkness and calming his terror.

Kariya held onto her more tightly. "Nightmare," he gulped.

"Can you tell me about it?"

"Well, there were these big worms, a-and one of them went into my mouth, and—and…" Kariya trailed off, sobbing.

"That sounds very scary!" Kobato exclaimed seriously.

Kariya nodded, digging his face deeper into her shoulder.

"However," Kobato went on, raising one finger and smiling down at him optimistically, "It was just a dream, and dreams aren't real. You're safe now."

Kariya sat back and nodded again, wiping away his tears with the back of his fist. "Mhm," he mumbled.

"Are you ready to go back to sleep?"

The boy shook his head.

"Hmmmmm…" Kobato put a finger to her chin thoughtfully. Then she smiled again, clapping her hands together. "I know! We can drink some hot tea downstairs. Then maybe you won't be scared anymore, and you'll feel like going to bed again."

"Mhm," Kariya repeated. He stood up with Kobato, holding her hand, and they went downstairs to the kitchen.

There was a water-boiler already filled on the counter, so Kobato simply pressed its button to start it heating. She then opened the cupboards and pulled out two tea cups, two packets of green tea, a jar of honey, and a spoon. Kariya sat at the kitchen table and watched, subconsciously trying to remember his nightmare, even though every thought of it sent chills down his spine.

Humming an indecipherable tune to herself, Kobato tore open the tea packets and dropped one into each cup. As she worked, the crackling of the water boiler turned into a deep, rolling sound. Hearing this, Kobato abruptly spun back toward it to take it off its stand, but her elbow hit one of the tea cups along the way. It shattered loudly on the floor.

"Oh no, I'm sorry!" Kobato cried. Dropping to the floor, she began frantically scooping up shards of teacup in her hands.

There was a sound of footsteps descending the stairs, and Kariya looked toward the door as Fujimoto stepped in, his eyebrows knitted together grumpily. He was wearing a white t-shirt and loose, dark blue pants, but his hair was still tied and his glasses on. He pressed a hand to his forehead, half-covering one eye and clenching his teeth. "Kobato, what are you doing?" he sighed.

"Huh?" Kobato popped up from behind the table like a prairie dog, shards of china in her cupped hands. "Aah! Kiyokazu! I'm sorry!"

Fujimoto strode over to her and seized her wrists, turning her hands to make her drop the shards. "What are you doing? You'll cut yourself!" he snapped. He went around to the other side of the round table and took a broom and a dustpan from the corner. As he worked to sweep up the broken teacup, Kobato tried to explain the situation.

"I heard Kariya-kun calling for help, so when I came out, I found him in the hallway. He'd had a terrible nightmare!" she said hurriedly, "He was too scared to go back to bed, so we came down here to have some tea, and then, well…" She lowered her head in shame.

"Never mind," Fujimoto grunted, standing up and dumping the broken teacup into the trashcan. He tapped the dustpan against the side so that every shard fell in, then returned the broom to the corner and faced Kobato again. "Is the water boiling?"

Kobato spun around and turned on the boiler again, which had flipped itself off when it got too hot. In the meantime, Fujimoto took out two new teacups and two packages of green tea, preparing three place settings. "Sit down," he said. Kobato sat abruptly next to Kariya. After pouring a little hot water into each of their cups, Fujimoto joined them at the table. He pushed the honey toward Kariya.

Shyly, Kariya stirred a spoonful of honey into his green tea, listening to the clinking of the spoon against the china. He returned the spoon to the honey jar and slid it to Kobato. Fujimoto suppressed a yawn, sitting in his chair with folded arms. The silence was deafening.

Kobato was the first to try to break it. "So, what shall we do tomorrow?" she asked brightly.

"I have to work tomorrow," Fujimoto said.

"Oh, but you're off on Saturday, right? We should take Kariya-kun out somewhere." She gasped suddenly. "That's it! A boat! We can take him to the park and ride one of those rowboats! Will you teach him how to row, Kiyokazu?"

Kariya smiled and cautiously sipped at his scalding tea, but Fujimoto seemed unimpressed.

"Shouldn't we be focusing on finding out who his family is?" he said.

"Oh, but we don't know how long that might take, so in the meantime, we might as well do something fun, right?" Kobato insisted.

"He's right, I need to get back to them," Kariya interjected suddenly, "I promised…"

"What did you promise?" Fujimoto asked.

"That…we'd be together again," he whispered.

"Kariya-kun! Are you remembering?" Kobato asked hopefully.

Kariya shook his head. "No, but…I promised."

"Don't worry! It'll be okay," Kobato said optimistically, "We'll do our best to find your family, won't we, Fujimoto?"

Fujimoto gave a grunt of acknowledgement. He stood up and placed his empty teacup in the sink. "Are you ready to go back to bed now?" he asked Kariya.

The boy shuddered. "I don't want to go back to that room," he replied.

"Oh, if you're scared to sleep alone right now, you can sleep in our room—can't he, Kiyokazu?" Kobato turned to him eagerly.

Fujimoto opened his mouth as if to protest, but then he closed it again with a sigh. "Fine," he said. He turned and went out of the room. A moment later, footsteps echoed up the wooden stairs.

"He's mad because I woke him up," Kariya mumbled into his tea.

"No," Kobato said, shaking her head and then smiling toward the door, "Kiyokazu is always like this, but he's actually very kind. Right now, he just wants to get some sleep so he can be energetic for work tomorrow. He's always worked very hard."

They sat together for a few more minutes, finishing their tea quietly. When they were done, Kobato said, "Now we should get some sleep too. We have a lot to do tomorrow!" They headed upstairs and down to the room at the end of the hall. Fujimoto was already asleep in bed, facing away. For a moment, Kariya considered telling Kobato that he didn't want to be a bother, then return to his room, but the very thought seized him with such terror that he kept silent.

Kobato had him climb into bed first beside Fujimoto, and then she snuggled under the covers as well, turning to her side to face him. She laid one hand on his chest as he stared up at the ceiling. "Don't worry; everything's going to be okay," she whispered.

"Mhm," Kariya replied, but he didn't believe her. Deep in the back of his mind, something felt wrong, and this wrongness spread through his whole body, infecting his heart. Whatever it was that he couldn't remember screamed at him that nothing was going to be okay.

For a long time after Kobato fell asleep, Kariya stared at the pale moonlight on the ceiling. Then exhaustion overcame him without him even noticing, and he sank into a dreamless sleep.

The next morning, after Fujimoto had gone to work, Kobato announced, "We are going to see Kohaku-san today!" She was wearing a white and green spring dress with a yellow pattern of flowers and a matching hat.

"Who's Kohaku?" Kariya asked.

"She's an angel from Tenkai," Kobato replied, "But she's living here in Ningenkai so she can be with Shuichiro. If anyone can find out why you can't remember, she can."

Kariya hadn't understood most of what she said. "What do you mean she's an angel?"

"She's not from this world," Kobato explained, "And she knows about things that most people don't know about, like how Ioryogi can talk even though he's a stuffed toy!" She gasped. "Oh, I should ask for Ioryogi's help too! Maybe he can find something out about you. He always seems to know a lot."

"Where's Ioryogi from?" Kariya asked, remembering that she had mentioned him the day before.

"I'm not sure," Kobato admitted, "He never told me. He was always around to help me back then, but now I don't see him as often. He was helping me to get my wish, so now that I have it, he's not always here anymore."

"You got your wish?" Kariya said as they left the glade and began walking down the sidewalk toward the main part of the city.

"That's right!"

"I have a wish."

"What is it?"

"I want to keep my promise."

"I see," Kobato said, "You want everyone to be together again, right?"

Kariya nodded, a happy warmth rising in his cheeks. "Now I just wish I could remember who 'everyone' is so we could be together," he said with a shy grin, scratching the back of his head.

"That's a wonderful wish!" Kobato exclaimed, "It will definitely come true!"

"Do you really think so?"

"Definitely!"

Before long, they arrived at the gate of a large house in the city. Kobato pressed the doorbell and a buzz went off. A moment later, the gate swung open to reveal a small, slim woman with golden hair and amber eyes. Her hair was all swept over her head to the side so that it fell in a wave onto her right shoulder, and it was much shorter than Kobato's. She wore an elegant, purple blouse that tapered to a stiff point behind her knees, creating an almond shape around her dark blue jeans.

"Kohaku-san!" Kobato began with a big smile, "I want you to meet Kariya-kun!" She guided him so that he was standing in front of her, placing her hands on his shoulders.

Kohaku got down to the boy's level, her hands on her knees. "Pleased to meet you, Kariya-kun," she said brightly.

"I'm pleased to meet you too," Kariya replied.

Kariya needs help with remembering," Kobato announced.

"I woke up in the alley yesterday, without any memories," he explained shortly.

"I see," Kohaku said, standing. She turned to welcome them inside.

Through the gate, they came into a large, green yard with an Asian-style house in the center, its wood walls painted yellow with sliding doors. On the left side of the house, there was a wooden porch looking out over a small pond and a wild orchard and garden. Kohaku led them over to the porch, and they sat down together, Kariya in the middle.

Sitting straight-backed on her knees, Kohaku looked sideways at him. "So when you say you have no memories, do you really mean none at all?" she asked.

"I don't remember who I am, or where I'm from, or who my family is," Kariya replied, "But I do remember that I promised we'd be together. I really, really want to keep that promise, because…" He trailed off, clutching at his blue hoodie over his heart.

"Because…?"

"I don't remember," he admitted quietly, "But I have to."

"Is there anything else?"

"He was having a nightmare when I found him, and he had another very scary one last night!" Kobato put in, "He dreamed that worms were getting in his mouth!"

Kariya shuddered and hunched over, grasping his left arm so that it hung down between his legs. "Well, I don't even remember the dream much now, but I'm still scared," he said, "It was horrible."

"Close your eyes," Kohaku instructed, and Kariya obeyed. The sounds of the wind in the treetops and the chirping birds were suddenly very distinct. "Now," Kohaku said, "Just be quiet for a while and try to focus. See if you can remember anything else at all: names, faces, emotions, anything. Anything you can think of will be helpful."

Kariya took a deep breath and tried to sink into his own mind, searching. Yet the farther he went, the more an oppressive dread began to build. It seized the back of his throat and swirled in his chest, forbidding him to continue forward. "No," he told himself, "I promised." Remembering his promise gave him strength, and he ignored the fear, casting about for any hint of a memory that might give him a clue. Suddenly, a different emotion broke through the darkness like a flash of fire. His eyes snapped open. "I'm angry," he said. He felt a tension in his hands and looked down to see that they were clenched, white-knuckled on his knees. He was leaning on them heavily.

Kohaku's eyebrows knitted together in concern. "Did someone hurt you?"

"No, they hurt—Well, maybe…" Kariya stammered.

"They hurt someone else?"

"I don't know—I'm confused, s-stop it," Kariya mumbled, pressing his hands over his face.

"Kariya-kun—"

"Shut up!" he screamed, "I'll kill you!"

Silence fell over everything. Even the wind and the birds seemed to pause with bated breath. Kohaku raised her amber eyes to Kobato's face.

Then Kariya drew in a sharp breath through his teeth, clutching at the back of his head. A sharp pain had just exploded there, shooting all the way down to his back and tingling in his fingertips. He stood up.

"Kariya-kun!" Kobato cried, jumping to her feet as well, "Are you okay? Does it hurt?"

"Just the scratches stinging," Kariya grunted, "Please, I—need some time alone." With that, he turned and ran from the porch, disappearing around the corner of the house. Kobato tried to run after him, but Kohaku caught her by the arm.

"I need to talk to you," she said.

Kariya sprinted halfway around the house, diving into the orchard and collapsing with his back against a blossoming cherry tree. Pink petals swarmed violently around him as a gust of wind rushed through the tree, and he winced again, grasping at the back of his neck as another pain shot down his back. "No," he whimpered, "No-no-no-no-no-no…leave me alone!" Gasping, he curled up on his side and began to sob. Piercing pain travelled in waves through his skull and down his spine, but it wasn't the pain that made him cry. It was the anger: the faceless, formless hatred. _I'll kill you!_

_ I'll kill you!_

Chapter Three: "Nightmare"

By the time Kobato came looking for Kariya, he had managed to calm himself down, and the pain in the back of his head had receded to a dull throbbing. He didn't want to tell her about that pain. He knew that it wasn't the scratches that were hurting, but if he told her about it, she might take him back to the hospital. If he went back there, they might keep him, and then he wouldn't be able to stay at Kobato's house again. There was peace at Kobato's house. He wanted to stay there almost as much as he wanted to keep his promise. For the moment, then, he decided to ignore the ache and hope it went away.

After leaving Kohaku's house, they stopped by a small convenience store called "Piffle Palace", where Kobato bought groceries. She also bought a few outfits for Kariya—dark green, dark blue, and gray—since they didn't know how long he would be staying, and she bought a small night light "to ward off the nightmares".

When they arrived back home, Kariya was only mildly surprised to see a small, plush, blue dog sitting on the table, though he couldn't remember seeing it before. Kobato let out an exclamation of delight and dropped the grocery bag on the table, sweeping the dog into a hug. "Ioryogi-san! You're here!" she cried, then spun around and held the toy out to Kariya. "Ioryogi-san, this is Kariya-kun. He's staying with us for a while!" The dog's cylindrical arms and legs and its ears were darker blue than the rest of its body, and it wore a huge, red collar with spikes all around.

For the first time, Kariya asked himself whether Kobato might be a little crazy. When she had told him about her toy dog friend, saying that Ioryogi could talk, he had gone along with it, not feeling he was in a position to say whether a toy could or couldn't speak. After all, there could be anything lurking in his lost memories. Now, however, as the dog stared at him with blank dot-eyes, he didn't know what to think. "I—I thought you said…" he ventured.

"Oh, I forgot. Ioryogi doesn't talk around most people because he says stuffed toys don't talk in this world," Kobato explained apologetically.

Realizing with a jolt that Kobato was probably just trying to play pretend with him, Kariya blushed and seized Ioryogi's paw. "How do you do?" he said.

The dog's plush brow suddenly furrowed and its mouth opened into a little triangle as it raised its nose toward him. "Huh?" it said.

Kariya recoiled. "Oh…!" was all he could say.

"Dobato," Ioryogi began in a surprisingly deep, gruff voice, looking up at her, "Where did you find this boy?"

"Hmm?" Kobato tilted her head curiously. "Well, he was asleep in an alley, but he has a family somewhere. He just can't remember them right now. But why are you talking to him? I'm surprised!"

"Are you sure he's from here?" Ioryogi asked.

"Kohaku said something similar," Kobato said brightly, raising a finger. She turned to Kariya and clasped her hands together. "Kariya-kun, when I first arrived here with Ioryogi, I didn't have any memories either. I only had my wish. Maybe you came the same way that I did?"

"Wh-what do you mean?" Kariya stammered. After seeing Ioryogi talk, he was ready to accept anything.

"Kobato was a casualty in a battle between Ikai—the spirit world, where I come from—and Tenkai—also known as Heaven, where Kohaku is from," Ioryogi explained gruffly, "Because of this, she was given a temporary life to live four seasons here in Ningenkai and heal wounded hearts. If she could heal enough hearts, she would be given her wish to be reincarnated by the side of her most precious person.

"Fujimoto…" Kariya said.

Ioryogi gave a short nod, folding his plus arms. "She is living here now because of her wish."

"So Kohaku said we should consider the possibility that you're from a different world too, and you just can't remember it," Kobato suggested.

"That's not possible!" Kariya screamed with sudden vehemence, tears springing to his eyes.

Kobato drew back slightly. "Wh-why not?" she asked, her face softening with worry.

"Because if…if that happened…" Kariya shuddered, "If that happened, I wouldn't be able to keep my promise."

"It doesn't matter how much you want it to be false," Ioryogi pointed out, "It's still possible."

"No, you don't understand!" Kariya cried, flinging out his hands in appeal, "I can't fail at this!"

"At what?" Ioryogi grunted.

Kariya deflated, his arms falling limply by his sides. All that remained was the desperation in his eyes, but he couldn't find a reply.

"If you can't even remember why you made a promise, maybe it isn't as important as you think," Ioryogi reasoned, "Even if it is important, you can let it go if it becomes impossible to keep. You would no longer be under any obligation."

"But there are plenty of other possibilities, aren't there?" Kariya pleaded.

"Of course!" Kobato replied, "Kohaku just said it's something to think about."

"Yes, just to think about," Kariya echoed.

That night over supper, Kobato explained their theory to Fujimoto.

"It's far more likely that the memory loss is psychological or physical," was his reply," I spent my break today searching missing child ads for a boy named Kariya, but the only one I found was from halfway across the country, and the boy's picture and age didn't match up. Kariya…" he turned to the boy with a sigh. When Kariya met his eyes, he saw they were pitying.

"The possibility you should really be preparing yourself for is that your family doesn't want you anymore," he said gently.

Surprisingly, this suggestion hit home with Kariya, striking him somewhere deep. It didn't seem wrong, and that fact disturbed him even more than when Kobato said he might be from a different world. "But then…" he began shakily, "why would I promise that we would be back together again?"

"It might have been a promise that you made to yourself," Fujimoto said. He watched Kariya's face for a moment, then sighed, pressing his fingers to his forehead and looking to one side. "My mother abandoned me when I was about your age," he admitted, "When she disappeared, I promised myself for years that I would find her again, but I've still never seen her to this day. I'm not saying the same thing has happened to you, but you should be ready to let go of that promise if it turns out to be the case."

"No, that's not it…That can't be it," Kariya whispered, staring fixedly at his plate, "We were going to do something fun together. That's right…we were going to do that."

Fujimoto nodded. "Tomorrow morning, we'll take you back to the hospital," he said, "If it had been me, I wouldn't have brought you back here in the first place."

"But he didn't want to stay there!" Kobato protested, "and besides, Sayaka-sensei's father helped you, didn't he? And she gave me an apartment and let me help out at Yomogi Preschool when she didn't know anything about me! We should do the same for Kariya-kun!"

"I didn't show up with no memories, and you looked to be nineteen years old," Fujimoto pointed out, "We need to find out what's behind Kariya-kun's memory loss. If it means he'll have to stay in the hospital for a while, that's what we're going to do."

Kariya squeezed his eyes shut, suppressing tears. A sharp twinge appeared in his left lung, and he pressed his hand against it. Was this it, then? Would he only be able to stay here one more night? There was peace and joy in this place. He wished he could stay here forever.

"If you can remember," Fujimoto said in a low voice, "you might be able to keep that promise."

Kariya opened his eyes again and felt a cold tear roll down his cheek. Staying here didn't matter. What mattered was his promise. He nodded and smiled, a new determination filling his chest. "I'll do whatever it takes," he said.

In case he had another nightmare, Kariya was given a different bedroom closer to Kobato and Fujimoto's room. Once he was in bed, Kobato proudly brought in the nightlight she had thought to buy and plugged it in before turning out the light.

A toxic, green light spread across the room.

Kariya screamed.

Everywhere the green light struck its deep, contrasting shadows, eh saw huge, fat worms: writing, crawling over each other, hissing. "Turn it off!" he cried, shutting his eyes tightly, but the visions he saw in the light through his eyelids were even worse. Blood…a child's body half-buried in the worms. "Please!"

Suddenly, bright white light flooded the room, and the horrible images vanished. Kobato stood in the doorway, her eyes wide with horror. "I'm so sorry!" she cried, "I thought the nightlight would help!"

"Th-there were worms," Kariya gasped, still shaking uncontrollably. Cold sweat stung his forehead. "It was the same light I saw in my nightmare."

Kobato ran in and sat on the bed, pulling him up to a sitting position so she could hug him. "I'm sorry," she repeated quietly.

Kariya took deep, shuddering breaths, trying to calm himself. At last, he said, "It's okay, I can go to sleep now. I don't need a nightlight."

"But what if you have another nightmare?" Kobato exclaimed.

Kariya shivered, but didn't reply. He didn't want to trouble them.

"You can sleep in our room again tonight!" Kobato decided.

"But won't Fujimoto-san—"

"Kiyokazu understands," Kobato declared confidently, "He was left alone too when he was little, remember? I'm sure Sakura-sensei did the same thing for him when he was scared."

Kariya nodded. He couldn't imagine trying to sleep alone after what he had just seen.

When Kobato and Kariya both showed up at the door of the bedroom, Fujimoto didn't react, sitting on the bed and taking off his glasses. Despite her declaration in Kariya's room, Kobato tripped in hesitantly, gradually scooting over to Fujimoto's side. "Uhmm…" she began.

Fujimoto looked at her, then at Kariya sitting behind her. "Just as I thought," he observed, shifting and slipping his feet under the covers. "Anyway, don't worry about it." He lay down, facing away.

Kobato gave an affirming nod to Kariya, and they tiptoed in, climbing into bed with Kariya in the middle, like the night before.

Before long, Fujimoto and Kobato were both sound asleep. Kariya lay there, listening to their peaceful breathing on either side of him. Closing his eyes, he calmed his own breathing and tried to absorb all the happiness of this moment. Maybe this would be his last night here, in the house of wishes come true. He had to live deeply in this moment, because he didn't know what would happen in the days to come.

Just as before, Kariya lay awake for a long time before finally allowing himself to drift off to sleep. He was confident that he wouldn't have any nightmares as long as he was together with Kobato and Fujimoto.

He was wrong.

Somewhere between wake and sleep, he felt the blankets begin to move, growing cold and wet. Before long, they were no longer blankets but squirming worms, all bathed in that sickly, green light. Kariya slowly turned his eyes down toward them in horror, but this dream was different from the last one. He lay still, not screaming or struggling, but simply watching with nausea and terror running through him in waves.

There was a squelch close beside his left ear, then a sudden, dull rush as a worm pushed its way in. For a moment, eh could hear his own heartbeat, but there was more. There was a sound of writhing and scraping inside his own body. Before he had time to think about this, an unbearable pain seared through his ear, spreading across his whole head. Kariya clenched his teeth and let out an involuntary sob, but he still did not struggle.

The worm in his ear continued to scrape and burrow deeper while more worms crawled up onto his face, forcing their way into his nose, into the corners of his left eye. There was agony in his veins too, a scratching deep in his belly, a squealing in his brain.

As the worms began to poke at the corners of his lips, Kariya opened his mouth to let them in. There was a horrifying sense of resolve this time, of resignation and submission. Oppressive dread hung heavy around him, twisting and tightening around his heart, like the worms that also wrapped around it. Why was he not moving, not trying to escape?

_This is a nightmare_. The fact came to him intellectually, but he did not even close his mouth, gagging as worms made their way both in and out. The taste was foul and slimy. In his mind, he began to struggle. _Get out. Get out. Get out._ Panic seized hold of him. He had to get out! But what then? If he got out, there was something looming on the other side, something even worse than these worms. What could be worse than this? The thought of it on the dark edges of his imagination filled him with terror. This he could endure, but not that. He choked and swallowed the worms in his mouth.

Yet his consciousness continued to fight, remembering that he was having a dream. Gradually, the stone beneath his head became soft, and the writhing, heavy wetness on his arms and legs became cool and light. The worms on his face slowly faded away, and with them the agony that had invaded him everywhere. His eyes opened, but that oppressive terror still clung to him. For almost a full minute, he couldn't move, then shudder after shudder wracked his body. His stomach turned.

Cautiously, but shivering all over as with fever, he slid out from under the blankets, drawing his knees up to his chest. Then he crawled to the end of the bed and climbed out, glancing back over his shoulder to make sure he hadn't disturbed Fujimoto or Kobato.

He ran. Bare feet padding quietly on the carpet, he fled to the bathroom and collapsed on his knees over the toilet. He retched and threw up—again, thrice, four times, until he was gagging up nothing. Gasping for air, he finally collapsed against the wall, leaning on his right hand, his left arm lying limp between his legs. He swallowed, trying to lessen the taste of vomit, and leaned his head far back so that he was staring at the ceiling. A bit of light came in from the hallway, making the paint glow a dull gray and casting black shadows behind the simple, hanging lamp.

Kariya hadn't forgotten his dream this time. Though the details were distorted and blurry, the horror remained sharp and clear. Why hadn't he struggled or screamed in this one? He'd been screaming in his last dream, hadn't he? So much so that he had woken Kobato up. Why, then, in this one, had he been so silent and submissive. The thought of his submission to it all was somehow even worse than the worms themselves. Were these memories, or were they just his mind trying to terrify him?

Wanting to get rid of the awful smell of vomit, Kariya stood shakily and flushed the toilet. Then he went to the sink and drank some water, cupping his hands under the faucet. He glanced at the digital clock, biting his lip at its green glow. One-fifteen. It didn't matter; he wasn't going back to bed anyway. Padding out into the hallway, he went downstairs and began to pace restlessly through the rooms. Back and forth, in and out, his thoughts a jumbled mess.

What if the thing worse than the worms was breaking his promise? Although both Ioryogi and Fujimoto had told him today that he might have to let it go, he couldn't let it go. There was something worse out there; something that not even his nightmares could stand up against.

Chapter Four: "Matou"

Somewhere around four in the morning, Kariya was still awake and still pacing. He was too shaken by the nightmare to even think about going to sleep again. Yet this was somehow nice: being awake in what could be his last hours in this house. It was a beautiful place, modestly and airily decorated with only the essentials: a few couches, a few chairs, a few lamps with pastel flower patterns. It was dark in a warm way, with only moonlight shining in. As Kariya paced through the dim rooms, his heart found peace in spite of itself.

However, over the night, the ache reappeared in the base of his skull and began to grow. The dull throbbing increased gradually, but it remained faint enough for Kariya to ignore it until suddenly, before sunrise, it changed. Without warning, searing pain ripped through his head—as awful as the agony in his nightmares. Kariya screamed and fell to his knees on the floor, clutching at the back of his head. It wouldn't let up, only seeming to grow in intensity, and he twisted onto his back, clawing at the carpet. "Help! Help—please!" he cried.

There were strong arms wrapping around him, holding him firmly still. Over his own cries, he could hear a few beeps, then a voice close to his ear. "119? We have a medical emergency—a child collapsed. In serious pain. Yes, my name is Kiyokazu Fujimoto. The address…"

Before the call was even finished, Kariya gave out thrashing and straining, falling unconscious in Fujimoto's arms.

When Kariya came to, the pain was all but gone. Glancing around drowsily, he saw that he was in a hospital bed, with a thin, white blanket draped over him. The next moment, Kobato's anxious face was looming over him. Her eyes and cheeks were red from weeping.

"Kariya-kun!" she cried, "Kiyokazu, Domoto-san—he's awake!" She seized his hand and flopped down, pressing her forehead against his shoulder. "This is all my fault," she whimpered, her voice muffled.

Kariya tried to tell her that it wasn't, but the only thing that came out of his mouth was a faint squeak. His eyes closed again, heavy with exhaustion. Beside him, there was a rapid movement as Kobato sat up with a gasp. "Kariya-kun!"

"He's all right, Kobato-chan," came a gentle, optimistic voice from somewhere behind her, "It might take some time for the anesthetic to wear off. The voice sounded familiar, and when Kariya felt a firm hand on his shoulder, he knew who it was. "Can you hear me, Kariya-kun?" the voice said, "We had to put you under anesthesia for a while because you were in so much pain. Are you still in pain?"

"Not much," Kariya mumbled, managing to half-open his eyes again. Yes, that was Domoto standing above him, wearing a white lab coat.

"Thank goodness," piped Kobato's voice form beside him.

"Where does it hurt?" Domoto asked.

Kariya reached up and pressed a thin hand to the back of his head.

"You mean where your injuries are?"

"No…inside."

Through a haze, Kariya could see Domoto's brows knit together in concern. "There might be something in your head that's causing both this and your memory loss," he said, "We're going to run a few scans on your brain to see if we can find anything."

"Matou," Kariya said. He shuddered inexplicably.

"Hm?"

"My surname. For…for your records. It's Matou…"

"You remembered!" Kobato gasped.

"Is there anything else you can remember?" Domoto asked.

Kariya tried to think, but his head hurt, and his mind was blank. "No," he admitted quietly.

"Well, now we should be able to track down his family," remarked a stern voice from beside the bed. Kariya looked to see Fujimoto sitting there beside Kobato, wearing a leather jacket with his arms folded. "We'll get some help from the police." He stood up. "Take good care of him, Kobato," he said, "When I get back, I'll let you know what I've found. Hopefully, I'll have his parents with me by then."

"Right!" Kobato affirmed with a determined nod, "I'll do my best!"

"Wait, I-I think I have sisters," Kariya stammered suddenly, trying to sit up, "Two little sisters, but…I can't remember their names, or what they look like."

"You're remembering a lot today!" Kobato exclaimed brightly, clapping her hands together, "At this rate, you'll soon be able to remember everything!"

"Any information will be useful," Fujimoto told him. "Now I'll be going. Call me if you need anything." He turned and headed toward the door.

Domoto put his hands on Kariya's shoulders and made him lie down again. "Please try to relax," he urged, "If anyone can find your family, Kiyokazu-san can. In the meantime, we need to find out what's wrong with you."

"Okay," Kariya mumbled. He winced and pressed a hand to his side.

"What is it?" Domoto asked.

"It hurts here a little too," Kariya said, clenching his teeth with a grunt as the pain's intensity rose sharply and then faded.

"We need to start those scans right away," the doctor said.

Kariya spend all that morning and well into the afternoon trying to hold still as he slid in and out of various, tube-shaped apparatuses. The machines hummed and whirred, and all the while, Kariya was alone with his thoughts. They were jumbled, confusing thoughts. Frightening thoughts. The name "Matou" kept rolling around in his mind, each time bringing with it a pulse of dread. Why? Could it be that Fujimoto was right? What if his family had abandoned him?

Then there was this new memory of his sisters. At least, he thought they were his sisters. Every time he thought of them, his heart twisted with affection, though they only appeared to his memory as faceless little girls. They seemed younger than him. Yet trying to remember them was like attempting to recall a forgotten dream. The harder he tried to reach it, the more it eluded him

Sometime during all the bustle, one of the senior doctors came in and talked seriously with Domoto about the possibility of brain cancer. This doctor was taller than Domoto and strongly built with short, black hair and narrow, dark eyes. When Kariya heard them calling him "Shuichiro", he recognized the name, and Kobato explained that the doctor was Kohaku's husband.

However, even after all the scans, no evidence of cancer could be found. "If it was cancer serious enough to hurt him lie this and begin spreading to other parts of the body, it certainly would have shown up in the scans," Shuichiro explained to Kobato once they were back in the hospital room, "So I believe we can rule that out for now."

"Thank goodness!" Kobato exclaimed, letting out her breath in a long sigh of relief.

"Yes, it is good news," Domoto said, "But the problem is, we still don't know what's wrong with him."

"Run some lab tests," Shuichiro instructed, turning to leave the room, "I have some other patients to check up on now, but let me know what you find."

"Yes, sir," Domoto replied, bowing formally. As the senior doctor left, he moved over to Kariya's bedside. "How are you feeling?"

"It still hurts a little, but it's not so bad," Kariya replied.

"In the same places?"

"Mostly."

Domoto frowned. "Where else does it hurt now?"

Kariya reached up and tenderly touched his left cheek. It burned where his fingers put a little pressure on his skin. "But only if I touch it," he said.

"Can I see?"

Kariya nodded and turned his head to the side so that Domoto could examine his cheek. The doctor ran his fingers carefully over the area, then gently pressed down just below the cheekbone. A searing pain suddenly burned across Kariya's face, shooting straight back to the clustering ache behind his head. He winced, and Domoto released the pressure quickly. "It hurts there?"

"Yeah…"

"It feels abnormal in that spot too," Domoto said, "As if there's unusual pressure in the veins. As soon as we get the samples for the lab tests, I want to check for blood clots."

"Blood clots?" Kobato cried, "That sounds bad!"

Domoto chuckled, but the concern never left his eyes. "I've never found a blood clot in the veins of the face before," he said, "but if there's clotting there, there might be clotting elsewhere, and that could help us find the cause of his pain." He went to the door and sent for the lab technician.

A few minutes later, a woman came in, rolling a cart full of all kinds of syringes, plastic cups, and other equipment Kariya didn't recognize. Tying a wide, rubber strap tightly across his arm, she swiftly drew three syringes of blood from his inner elbow. All the while, she spoke to him reassuringly, praising him when he didn't react to the prick of the long needle. After that, she asked if he could go to the bathroom, and with some careful instructions, she "obtained samples of both his urine and bowel," as she so professionally put it.

When all the samples were collected, the lab nurse headed off to get them tested while Kariya followed Domoto into yet another room full of medical equipment. Even though he told himself that this was what he needed to do, he was starting to get tired of it all. There was a rising sense of pointlessness to these tests. He just wanted time to rest and focus on remembering.

The test to check for a blood clot was an ultrasound. After gently spreading some warm, clear gel on Kariya's cheek, Domoto pressed a rounded instrument against it. The probe was connected to a screen that immediately displayed a grainy, gray image of Kariya's jaw. It burned where it touched, but Kariya pressed his lips together and endured it.

Kobato stared at the screen in fascination, leaning forward with her hands clasped. "Oooohh," she said, then turned to Domoto. "But—but what are we looking for?"

"Anything unusual."

Kobato looked at the screen again, brow furrowing in concentration. "What's unusual?"

"If it's a clot, it should show up as a small, bright spot."

"But it's all small, bright spots," Kobato said despairingly.

Kariya giggled, but his smile pressed his cheek harder against the probe, sending a wave of pain across his face. He winced and tried to remain expressionless.

"Wait," Domoto said, "What was that?" He slid the probe toward Kariya's ear, watching the screen intently.

"What's what?" Kobato asked.

"I thought I saw something just then," Domoto said, "Yes—look, there it is again." He pointed to the screen, where there was a small, brighter area. It looked like a little smudge, slightly wide and rounded on one end and tapering on the other.

"That's a blood clot?" Kobato asked, bringing her face close to the screen, but Domoto was silent, examining the image with his brows knitted together. Kariya's breath quickened and his eyes widened as he watched the screen. He could feel his heart pounding in his chest. The smudge seemed to move slightly, but everything else in the picture was swirling around so much, it was impossible to tell.

If it was a clot, I would expect it to be rounder…" Domoto said slowly, "Although that might just be some inaccuracy in the imaging…"

Suddenly, Kariya knocked the probe away with such force that it was torn from Domoto's hand and clattered to the floor. He scrambled to a sitting position, breathing heavily and staring into nothing. "It was a worm," he gasped.

Domoto turned to him with a thoughtful frown. "That doesn't seem likely…"

"Kariya-kun had a bad dream about worms the other night," Kobato explained.

"I see." Domoto moved to Kariya's side, placing a hand on his shoulder. "Kariya-kun," he began gently, "I know that smudge looked a little like a worm, but it's extremely unlikely that we would find one in your face. I'm sure it was just—"

"No!" Kariya shook the hand off his shoulder, pulling his knees up to his chest and squeezing his eyes shut. "It was a worm!" he shouted.

Domoto looked at Kobato helplessly. "I really don't think…"

Just then, the lab nurse appeared at the door, her dark brown eyes flicking anxiously between Kariya and Domoto. "Doctor, do you have a minute to talk?" she asked in a low voice. Domoto nodded and followed her out. A minute later, a different nurse arrived and began cleaning the gel off Kariya-s cheek, but he barely acknowledged her. Wrapping his arms tightly around his knees, he cried silently into his black pants.

Escorted by the nurse, Kobato and Kariya returned to the room to wait for Domoto. Not wanting to lie down, Kariya sat on the edge of the bed, and Kobato sat beside him. By then, Kariya had stopped crying, but he touched his fingertips to his cheek, feeling the burning pain spread across his face. Glancing to the side, he saw that Kobato had her head lowered, the brim of her hat hiding her eyes. Her hands were clasped tightly in her lap.

A single tear glistened, splashing down on her thumb.

Hesitantly, Kariya took his fingers down from his cheek and reached over, holding her hand in his pale, small one. His skin seemed somewhat grayer than before, but maybe it was just the lighting.

He didn't know why he had done it, but he wanted to comfort her somehow. She reminded him of someone.

"Oh no," Kobato hiccupped, "Ioryogi's always telling me that I'm letting other people heal me when I should be…I should be…" She turned and put her arm around his far shoulder, pulling him into a hug. "I'm sorry, Kariya-kun. It must be so scary."

"I had another bad dream last night," Kariya mumbled,  
It was the same dream about the worms, but this time I wasn't fighting. It was like I wanted them inside me."

"Did you?"

He shook his head, his face pressed into her shoulder and tears staining her light dress. "No, but…I think it had something to do with my promise."

"Is your promise that important?"

Kariya was silent for a long while. Then he whispered, "I think it is."

At that moment, there was a polite knock on the door, and Domoto came in. Kobato and Kariya sat up straight, both rubbing away their tears.

"The lab results came in," Domoto began, speaking with difficulty. "Kariya-kun, it seems you may have been right. They found something that looked like eggs in all the samples they tested."

Kariya choked on a sob, hiding his face in his hands.

"All of them?" Kobato cried, "You…you mean everywhere?"

"Yes, it's some kind of parasite," Domoto said, "And what we saw on the ultrasound may very well have been one that has already hatched. Kariya-kun." He walked up to the boy and knelt down to his level. "We're going to start you on some different medicines to kill them. Do you understand? We'll get rid of them as fast as we can, and then you can go home, okay?"

"They're the same worms as in my dreams," Kariya choked out. Panic clung to him and he could barely breathe. "Don't you get it? I-it's a memory too. They have to be there. They won't go away!"

"Kariya-kun, please understand that your nightmares don't show you exactly what happened, even if they might be recalling when you were infected with these things. They're parasites, so they can be killed. It's treatable.

Suddenly, Kariya slammed his hands down on the edge of the bed grasping tightly at the corner. "Well, what if I don't want it treated?" he screamed in Domoto's face, "Damn you—how could you be so calm?! You don't even care about her!" In his outburst, the veins in his cheek stood out, but the next instant, his eyes were wide with horror. Tearing at his hair, he doubled over with a despairing cry. Then he slipped off the bed, shoving past Domoto and fleeing into the hall.

Chapter Five: "Hatred"

The sun had set by then, so when Kariya ran out of the room, the hallway was mostly empty. Dodging past a couple nurses who were cleaning things up for the night, he sprinted to the end of the hall and around the corner. In his mind, he pleaded with Domoto not to follow him. Why had he said those things?

_Damn you—how could you be so calm?! You don't even care about her!_ In that moment, he hadn't been looking at Domoto; rather, his eyes were filled with the image of another man: a pointed, brown beard; a self-satisfied smile. Anger boiled inside him just as it had at Kohaku's house.

"I hate him," he muttered as he ran, "I _hate_ him!"

Finally coming to an empty waiting room, Kariya ducked inside and stumbled around behind a small, potted tree in the corner. It was dark here, with a gentle orange light floating in through the window. Kariya breathed a sigh of relief.

Who was he?

By this, Kariya didn't mean the wicked man in his visions; he meant himself. He didn't know what eight-year-olds were supposed to feel like, but he certainly didn't feel like one. He felt so much older: so weary, so angry, so protective. He remembered what it had felt like to take Kobato's hand when she was crying. Why should she trouble herself so much with him? He wasn't worth it. He was like that crumpled carton back in the alley.

They would be looking for him. Surely they wouldn't let a patient full of worm eggs go running loose around the hospital. Shuddering, he hid his face between his knees. He wished this could all be over. It was so exhausting, His heart trembled on the verge of collapse. If it collapsed, he feared he would stop caring.

He had to care. His promise…

There was a sound at the doorway, and Kariya looked up with a quiet gasp. A tall figure stood silhouetted there, a long, narrow ponytail hanging down his back and the glint of glasses on his face.

"Fujimoto-san…" Kariya said shakily, somehow glad that it wasn't anyone else.

Fujimoto turned and saw him behind the plant. He strode in and stood over him. "You're making everyone worry. Let's go back."

"I yelled at Domoto-san…I didn't mean to."

"Domoto-san has had people yell at him before. He's fine," Fujimoto said matter-of-factly, "Let's go." He faced the door again.

"Wait—" Kariya jumped up, catching Fujimoto by the sleeve of his jacket. "Have you ever hated anyone?" he blurted out.

Fujimoto turned back to him, the creases between his eyebrows deepening. "What do you mean?"

"I'm starting to remember more," Kariya replied breathlessly, "And I remember hating someone. I don't know why, though."

For a moment, Fujimoto stared at Kariya. Then he placed a hand on his head.

"In response to your question, yes; I hated someone once. But I don't hate him now. He wasn't the kind of man I thought he was. If you start to remember why you hated this person, I hope you'll remember that too." Taking Kariya firmly by the hand, he went out of the room. This time, Kariya followed without resistance.

When they arrived back in Kariya's room, Domoo gave him several different anti-parasitical pills, explaining that they hadn't yet identified the specific parasite Kariya had. After that, he left them alone.

"Thank goodness Kiyokazu found you!" Kobato exclaimed, "I was worried!"

"I wasn't worried," Fujimoto remarked, "Kariya-kun is unusually mature for his age; basically the exact opposite of you, Kobato."

"Awww! Come on!" Kobato moaned, and Fujimoto smiled fondly.

Kariya also grinned in spite of himself.

"Anyway, did you find anything out about Kariya-kun's family?" Kobato asked, brightening up a little.

At this, Fujimoto frowned and leaned forward in his chair. A weight of seriousness descended over the room. "I didn't," he said upfront, and Kariya's heart sank. "More than that," he went on, "I was unable even to find record of a family with the surname 'Matou'."

"What? But how could that be?" Kariya asked, his thin voice shaking.

"Maybe what you're remembering isn't actually your surname," Fujimoto suggested.

_I hope it isn't,_ the thought occurred to Kariya. For some reason, the sound of that name made him feel like there was a pit n his stomach. Yet he couldn't shake the feeling that it was _his_ name. "Well, I'll try to think of it," was all he said.

Fujimoto nodded. "All right. Now try to get some rest. Your body is under a lot of stress, and we need to work on healing you quickly before it can get any worse."

"Okay."

Kobato put her cool hand on his forehead. "No nightmares tonight, okay?" she said brightly, "That way, you can wake up with energy tomorrow!"

"Thanks," Kariya smiled at her, though he still felt afraid as he closed his eyes. Cold fear swirled up from his stomach and wrapped around his heart. Worms? Was he really full of worms? He heard the scrape of a chair sliding back on the smooth floor, and a moment later, the white glow from behind his eyelids turned black. Kariya tried to open his eyes to see if tey had left, but his lids seemed stuck shut. He was so tired. Sleep rose up from deep beneath him, begging him to rest. Rest his eyes, rest his heart.

Yet his heart would not rest. A cold wind swirled around him, and far below glowed a myriad of city lights. Looking forward, he saw the man he hated: pointed beard, arrogant smile, brown hair falling over his bright, blue eyes…

He was speaking in a deep, grandiose tone, his voice reverberating into the night as he gestured smoothly with his hands. His neat, red suit glowed like blood. Like the blood of the deepest betrayal.

"Tohsaka!" The name tore from Kariya's throat, harsh as barbed wire. "I'll kill you! _I'll kill you!_" His scream rose to a fever pitch, and suddenly there was a buzzing all around him, an agonizing pulsing through his veins. Worms floated into his vision in the corner of his right eye, but they weren't smooth and soft like the worms of his former dreams. These were razor-backed with blade-like wings, stinging tails, and dripping fangs. They surrounded Kariya and dived at the man, who turned with a smile still playing on his lips.

Then, in the blink of an eye, everything changed. Angry redness filled Kariya's vision, and everything was searing, melting, burning. Shrieking echoed off the walls from his own voice, raging flames rushed all around him, every nerve on fire…

His back struck against something hard. He toppled over. He fell—

His head cracked against the hospital floor.

Everything was cold around him. Before he could understand what was going on, he felt himself lifted in strong arms. There was a crackling in his ears and softness beneath him as someone laid him back in bed, but every muscle in his body was tense. His breath came in incomplete gasps.

"Kariya-kun, can you hear me?" Fujimoto's voice cut through the smoke, anchoring him to reality. "You had another nightmare."

"Tohsaka—" Kariya gasped. Fujimoto's face faded into his vision above him. He turned his head jerkily and saw Kobato also standing by his bedside. Realizing his mouth was still stretched open from screaming, he closed it.

"Your cheek!" Kobato exclaimed, her eyes widening. Kariya reached up to touch it, but immediately drew his fingers back at the pain. It was worse than before.

"Wh—what is it?" he faltered.

"The veins are standing out visibly now," Fujimoto explained, "Does it hurt?"

"More than it did," Kariya mumbled, "But my dream…"

"What happened in your dream?" Kobato was kneeling by his bedside now, her hands wrapped around one of his.

"I was on fire. It was everywhere," Kariya whimpered, "But it's a memory, I know it is." He looked back up at Fujimoto, "It's Tohsaka, not Matou. Look for Tohsaka…my—my sisters…"

"I will, but tomorrow. It's only been an hour since you went to sleep.

"Only an hour?" Kariya struggled to sit up in bed, looking helplessly from Fujimoto to Kobato. "I didn't think you'd be here," he said after a while.

"Of course we're here!" Kobato exclaimed, "We wouldn't leave you alone like this!"

"But you don't even know me," Kariya mumbled, staring down and picking at the sheets.

"You don't even know yourself yet," Fujimoto pointed out, "but you still need someone to look after you."

Tears rose in Kariya's eyes, and he drew his knees up to his chest. "No one looks after me," he said, his voice breaking, "They all want to hurt me."

"What makes you think so?"

"Tohsaka…Matou…they make me afraid, or angry. There's only one thing…" Kariya trailed off, clenching a hand over his chest, bunching up his green nightshirt in his fist.

"One thing?" Kobato echoed quietly, tilting her head.

Kariya nodded, a sad smile barely flickering across his lips. A streetlight outside shone from behind his head, lining it with orange flame. "It's that thing I can't seem to reach. It's my promise."

"Your promise is very important to you," Kobato affirmed, "You're having lots of bad memories now, but maybe when you find all the bad memories, you'll also find the good ones. And then you'll remember your promise too."

"That's all I want," Kariya said.

"In that case, try to rest again," Fujimoto said. When Kariya looked up at him apprehensively, he added, "If you think your dreams are showing you memories, then even the nightmares will bring you closer to what you're really looking for. Isn't that what you want?"

"Mhm," Kariya replied, almost inaudibly. He lay down in the hospital bed gain, pulling the linen covers up to his chin. But his eyes remained open. A car passed on the street outside, causing light and shadows to chase each other across the ceiling.

Kobato scooted her chair closer to Kariya's bedside, an embarrassingly loud screech cutting through the silence as its legs dragged along the floor. She winced and squeaked, "I'm sorry!" Then, recovering herself, she reached over and began to stroke Kariya's hair. "We'll be right here if you get scared," she said, "We'll wake you up."

"Please don't wake me up," Kariya whispered, as his eyes closed, "Even if I'm scared. I want to remember as much as I can."

"In that case, be very brave," Kobato said, but she didn't leave off stroking his hair.

A tear escaped from Kariya's eye and trickled down his temple until it touched his ear. The soothing motion from Kobato's hand continued, and in time, he sunk back into sleep.

The rest of that night's dreams were filled with confusing, disconnected images: huge, wet worms shining in green light, razor-backed worms snapping their fangs, fire consuming him, trashy alleys, the smirking face of that man—Tohsaka. And there was another face with gentle eyes—a woman's face. Kariya awoke feeling at home but when he saw he was still in the hospital, his arms and legs went numb with longing. A heavy weight pressed down on his chest. Who was that woman? His mother? No…not quite. Kariya tossed his head, looking around the room as though as he thought he might see her there, but he only saw Kobato slumped uncomfortably on the railing of the bed and Fujimoto sleeping with his arms folded, trying to lean back in his chair.

The woman's face was fading. Kariya tried to grasp at the memory in his mind, but it dispersed suddenly, like the fog of a breath on a winter's day. He couldn't even remember what color her hair was. Sitting up, he winced as pain pounded through his head. He pressed a hand to his forehead, clenching his teeth and waiting for it to pass.

"Kobato-san," he said eagerly, as soon as it had faded enough for him to speak, "I think I had a good memory."

Kobato's eyes drifted open. She blinked a few times, then slowly raised her head. "Oh, Kariya-kun…" she said drowsily. Then, suddenly, she sat bolt-upright. "Kariya-kun, your hair!"

"Huh? My—" Kariya reached up to touch his hair, but Kobato had already jumped up and was sprinting out the door.

"I'll go get Domoto-san!" she shouted over her shoulder.

Curious, Kariya scooted forward and climbed out of bed, but as soon as he stood up, he was overcome with such dizziness that he had to sit down again. His head throbbed. After a few moments, the dizziness passed, and he tried again. Chills ran through him, and his legs felt unsteady, but he limped into the bathroom and looked in the mirror.

His mouth dropped open.

A streak of silver ran through his black hair, falling down along the left side of his face. His face also had changed. It seemed gaunter and grayer than before, and the veins on his left cheek bulged grotesquely. They hurt.

As Kariya stared at himself in the mirror, Kobato exploded back into the room. Domoto followed her with brisk, professional urgency. Kariya turned to face them. "I-I'm…" he faltered. His knees suddenly gave way, and he dropped weakly to a sitting position, clutching at his left arm. It was burning now, just like his face.

"Let's get him back in bed," Domoto said, turning to Fujimoto, who had just appeared at the door. The two men lifted Kariya gently and carried him back to his bed. Once he was settled, Domoto raised the head of the bed as far as it would go so that he was sitting up.

"Kobato-chan, will you please send for Shuichiro-san?" the doctor requested, "Just ask one of the nurses to go get him, then come back in here."

"What's happening to me?" Kariya asked shakily.

"Your hair is losing its color," Domoto replied, "Why, and how it might be connected to your parasites, we don't know yet. We've already had people working to identify the parasite, so today, we'll try to find out why this is happening, okay? In the meantime, I want you to keep taking your medicine."

While he was speaking, Kobato returned, and a nurse came in with a little, paper cup of pills and some water. She handed them to Domoto, who gave them to Kariya. The boy swallowed the pills eagerly.

"Will you bring Kariya-kun something to eat?" Domoto asked the nurse politely.

"Yes, sir," she said and headed back out.

"You have to make sure you keep eating during this time," Domoto explained, "Parasites steal the nutrients your body needs to keep you alive, so to be strong enough to fight them, you have to replenish that with food."

Kariya nodded, strangely amused by the fact that Domoto was explaining this to him. While they were waiting, Domoto checked his pulse, took his blood pressure, and listened to his breathing through a stethoscope. With all three vital signs, he seemed concerned. The pulse was high, the blood pressure low, and there was a rattling sound in his breathing—which was also more rapid than normal.

"Even so," he said to Kobato, taking the stethoscope down from his ears and settling it around his neck, "I would expect abnormal vital signs. What I'm worried about is the rattling in his breathing."

"They're in my lungs too," Kariya said, shuddering, "They're everywhere."

"It's possible, but not certain," Domoto told him.

Just then, Shuichiro came in, his assertive presence seeming to fill the room. Domoto stood up. "The patient reports increased pain in his face and new pain in his left arm," Domoto said, "His vitals are abnormal: high pulse, low pressure, and quickened breathing with a rattling sound. He was unsteady on his feet when I arrived, and you can see that his appearance has changed since yesterday."

Shuichiro sat down at Kariya's bedside and asked him to turn his head so he could examine the bulging veins and silver streak of hair. "Have the lab nurse take new samples and run tests on them," he instructed without breaking his concentration. Then he went on to ask Kariya a run of detailed questions about when the pain started, where it was, what his dizzy spell had been like, and more. By the time he was done, the lab nurse had arrived.

Tying an orange, rubber strap tightly around Kariya's arm, she rubbed the inside of his elbow with an alcohol wipe and inserted the needle for her first sample.

The moment she started drawing blood, a bulge appeared in Kariya's arm just beneath the strap. Rapidly, it wriggled down toward the needle.

Kariya's chest contracted. His blood rushed so loudly to his ears that he barely heard the room's collective gasp. Though he was still breathing—faster than ever—it felt like he was suffocating.

The squirming bulge reached the edge of the needle, and the blood stopped flowing into the syringe. The lab nurse froze in horror, staring down at it. It was about the size of a kidney bean.

"Get it out. Quickly," Shuichiro breathed. Domoto ran to one of the cupboards and retrieved a scalpel. He pressed it into Shuichiro's hand, and the senior doctor moved quickly forward, slitting open Kariya's arm above the bulge. Before the parasite had a chance to slip away, he pressed down on the vein with one finger and pinched Kariya's skin with his other hand.

A little, cone-shaped, lumpy worm with two thin tails dropped out and landed on the bedside table. Domoto quickly pressed a rag over Kariya's bleeding wound.

Then the worm expanded. In less than three seconds, it blew up from the size of a bean to slightly larger than an egg. Suddenly, two razorlike wings sprouted from its sides. Spines appeared along its back and spikes at the ends of its tails. It shot up into the air like a wasp, bearing needle-like fangs with a blood-chilling hiss.

Screams broke from Kobato and the nurse. Fujimoto leapt to his feet, and Domoto started back with a cry. Yet before anyone could even think about catching it, the worm flew at Shuichiro's face with a mangled squeal. The doctor half-stood and stumbled backwards, his eyes wide.

"Stop!" Kariya shouted, shutting his eyes tightly—yet in his voice was a command.

To everyone's surprise, the worm slowed to a hover, the angry buzz of its wings calming to a quiet whir. It turned around and floated back to Kariya, sinking down into his lap. Then its wings retracted, its sharp edges softened, and it became a docile blob on his leg.

Chapter Six: "Choking"

For a while, while everyone was frozen in place, staring at the worm with bated breath. Then horror descended over each of their faces. Kobato had fallen backwards on the floor when the worm attacked, and now she sat there, leaning back on her hands and trembling.

Fujimoto was the first to speak: "Wh-what…"

Kariya barely understood what was going on around him. He was watching the worm as it pulsed on his knee, memories and fragments of memories stabbing into him like knives all over his body. It was real. It was all real. Every horrifying moment of his nightmares: every worm pushing its way in an out of his throat, his eyes, his ears…the wasp-like worms swarming around him…There was another man he remembered now too: a wrinkled, ancient man—hunched over—with a round, bald head and wicked rows of grinning teeth. His eyes were black as pits, with little, silver dots glowing out of them where the pupils should be. Matou…

But there was more. There was something worse. As Kariya continued to stare down at the worm, something grabbed him by the throat—No…he grabbed _it_ by the throat. There was a choking, a struggling, a horrible silence all around…his hands tightened, and it was like they tightened around his own heart, squeezing to crush it, to burst it in his chest. Who was it…

Suddenly, Shuichiro's hands broke into his vision, and the memory broke and scattered like a mirror shattering on the floor. The worm was scooped up into a thick, plastic sample cup, and the lid was screwed on immediately. Inside, the creature broke out in spines, buzzing and bouncing off the sides furiously.

Kariya took gasping breaths, trying to catch the memories as they swirled away like leaves on the wind. "Matou—" he stammered, "Tohsaka—" This time, when he said "Tohsaka", his voice broke, and tears sprung to his eyes.

"What's that?" Shuichiro said.

"They're names," Fujimoto explained.

"I see." Straightening up, Shuichiro pressed a little sample cup into Domoto's hands. Instinctively, the doctor started back from it, but he managed not to drop it. Shuichiro headed for the door. "I'm going to call Kohaku," he said, pulling a flip phone out of his pocket as he went.

"Kohaku…" Kobato climbed to her feet and moved cautiously closer to Domoto, staring curiously at the worm in the jar. It was distorted by the plastic, almost filling the jar with its size, and still buzzing around furiously. Domoto set it down on the bedside table with shaking hands.

"Why would he call his wife?" he asked, looking to Fujimoto and Kobato for help.

Fujimoto nodded silently toward the lab nurse, and Domoto understood. Turning to her, he said, "Yui-san, will you leave us alone for a minute, please?"

Yui seemed eager to leave. Without even gathering up the blood-drawing equipment, which had fallen on the floor, she jumped up and pushed the lab cart out of the room, closing the door behind her.

For a few minutes, they were silent. Kobato sat on the bed, and Fujimoto and Domoto pulled their chairs a little closer so that they were facing each other in a circle. Domoto had returned to pressing the cloth over the cut on Kariya's arm, but Kariya took it and held it himself. They watched the worm. It had stopped bouncing off the walls of the cup, but still hovered in place, emitting a blood-chilling buzz.

"Can you tell it to calm down again?" Kobato ventured, glancing over at Kariya.

Kariya swallowed. "S-stop it," he said to the worm. Immediately, it sank to the bottom of the cup, its wins retracting and its back smoothing out.

Domoto's eyes widened.

"Domoto-san," Fujimoto began seriously, and the doctor looked at them helplessly. "There's something you should know about Kobato."

"Kobato…chan?" Domoro stammered, turnig to her confusion.

Fujimoto nodded, folding his arms. "When you first met Kobato, she wasn't from this world," he began, "Even I didn't know during the year she was helping at Yomogi Preschool, but Kohaku knew. Do you remember that blue, stuffed dog she always carried with her? He was a spirit assisting her to fulfill her task on earth so she could receive her wish and be reincarnated into this world.

"Ioryogi was very nice!" Kobato confirmed, "I had spring, summer, winter, and fall to collect enough kompeito to fill a bottle, and if I filled the bottle to the top, I would get my wish to go to a special place, which actually turned out to be by the side of a special person, who actually turned out to be Kiyokazu!"

"Wait—slow down," Domoto interrupted with a breathy, bewildered laugh, "I'm not following."

"Kobato was given a temporary life to heal wounded hearts for a year," Fujimoto explained, "The contract was, if she healed enough hearts in that time, she would be reincarnated by the side of the one she loved most."

"Who was Kiyokazu!" Kobato interjected again. Kariya thought he saw Fujimoto's cheeks redden slightly, though his expression remained serious.

"I see…" Domoto lowered his gray eyes with a strangely sad smile. "That explains everything." He looked up again, glancing from the worm to Kariya. "But what does this have to do with Kariya-kun?"

"We've considered the possibility that Kariya-kun may be from another world in some way—like Kobato," Fujimoto replied, "Have you ever seen a creature like that worm before? Is there anything about it in your records?"

"Well, I would have to check the records, but—I've never seen or heard of anything like that," Domoto admitted, nodding toward the sample cup. "Still, what I wonder about the most is why it would respond to his command.

"I wanted them in me," Kariya muttered, letting his head slump down and pressing the cloth more tightly over his cut, "All my nightmares were real. I let them get in me. There was a whole pit full of them."

"What's more," Fujimoto added, "in my research, I couldn't find any family by the name of 'Matou'—which was the surname he gave. He showed up in an alley with no memories, strange nightmares, parasites no one knows about, and a name that doesn't exist. What are we supposed to think about that?"

"It certainly is strange," Domoto said, "But aren't we being a little quick to jump to such assumptions?"

"I'm _not_ from another world," Kariya said through clenched teeth, the veins in his cheek standing out even more, "I just have to remember everything… I'll remember where I'm from. I'll remember who I need to be together with. I promised we'd all do something fun together."

While he was speaking, Shuichiro returned. He brought bandages for Kariya's cut and a man with the cleaning cart, who set about washing up the mess left on the floor in all the confusion. The cleaning guy sealed the needle in a biohazard bag, then sanitized the area while Shuichiro properly bandaged Kariya's arm. By the time they were done, Kohaku came through the door, wearing a slim, lavender shirt and dark blue cargo pants.

"How are you, Kariya-kun?" she asked gently, looking at him with her amber eyes, "I heard you were unwell."

"Yeah," Kariya replied weakly. He hoped Shuichiro had told her everything. He didn't want to repeat it all to her.

Coming to his bedside, Kohaku sat down next to Kobato and faced him. Her gaze turned to the worm in the plastic sample cup. "Is that what was in your arm?" she said.

Kariya nodded.

Kohaku took the cup and turned it in her hand, examining the worm without any hint of fear or disgust. "Could we have some time alone, please?" she requested.

"I would like to take the worm so we can try to identify it," Shuichiro said.

"I'm sorry, we need to keep it for a while," Kohaku replied.

Shuichiro gave a short nod to show he understood. "Send for me when you're finished," he said. Then he and the others headed for the door.

Kobato ran to Kariya's bedside and gave him a quick hug. "Keep being brave, okay?" she said, then she hurried out after the others and shut the door.

For a few moments, Kohaku was silent and thoughtful, staring down at the worm, which had inched its way stickily up the side of the cup and was staring at her through the plastic lid. Then she took a breath and began: "Last time I saw you, you told me you were angry at someone. Was it the person who put these worms in you?"

Kariya shook his head, watching the worm as well. Anxiety clawed at him as he looked at it, but he tried to shove it down. The image of such worms crawling all through him hovered at the dark edge of his thoughts as a dull pain pounded through him but that wasn't important. He needed to remember so he could keep his promise. "It was someone else," he responded, "A very old man. I remembered him when I looked at the worm a while ago. He has a very scary face, and a wide grin, and eyes that are like deep holes with lights shining out. He wanted to hurt me. Only…I think his name is 'Matou'."

"That's what you said your surname was," Kohaku observed.

Kariya shuddered and bit back nausea. "I think it is, but he's not my family. The worms are from him, though." He turned to Kohaku suddenly, his eyes wide and his eyebrows knitted together. "It's all real, Kohaku-san! All of my nightmares…th-there was a pit all full of worms, and I was lying in it, and I was letting them all crawl into me everywhere! It was like I wanted them in me, but I was being forced at the same time. I don't know why—" he gulped and hid his face in his knees, but the darkness left too much room for the imagination, Raising his head again, he stared at Kohaku without seeing her. His face was burning, and pain shot down his leg, but he only shifted slightly in response, sliding the leg down and then pulling it back up again/

"Maybe it has something to do with your promise," Kohaku suggested.

This sat well with Kariya. He nodded, squeezing his arms a little more tightly around his legs, a smile barely passing across his lips.

"Do you remember who you were angry with?"

"Yeah," Kariya muttered, leaning his chin on his knees. Dread rose in his lungs like a poison gas, making it difficult for him to breathe. "But you're going to hate me."

"I won't hate you," Kohaku assured him gently.

Not entirely convinced, but still needing to talk about, Kariya forced himself to continue. "I want to kill him," he said, but the words sounded somehow off. He looked down at the worm again. "I…wanted to kill him."

"You mean you don't hate him anymore, or he's already dead?" There was the slightest tremor in Kohaku's voice, but the glance of her amber eyes remained calm.

"Maybe both," Kariya mumbled, shivering, "I think I really did kill him, but all I know for sure now is what I saw in my dream last night. He had a pointed beard, and bright, blue eyes, and a red suit, but what I hated was how pleased with himself he seemed. I knew he was wicked, but he was always smiling and proud of what he'd done."

"What had he done?" Kohaku inquired.

"I don't know, but it was worse than anything," Kariya answered quickly. Tears stung his eyes, and he shut them tightly. "All I remember is being up high somewhere and facing him, and all these worms swarmed up around me at him—they can fly too. Did you know that?"

"Shuichiro described it to me," she replied.

"Right, so they all flew at him, and then I don't know what happened. I was all on fire. It hurt terribly—Kohaku-san, can you feel pain in your dreams?"

"Some people can," she replied, "although I never have."

"I hit something hard, and then I fell," Kariya went on, "but it woke me up. I don't know what happened after that, but I remember the man's name—it was 'Tohsaka'."

"Tohsaka," Kohaku repeated thoughtfully.

Hearing that name said back to him, Kariya let out a sudden sob. Tears came to his eyes again, and this time, he couldn't hold them back. A few rolled down his gray cheeks.

"What is it?" Kohaku asked.

"There's more to that name than just him," Kariya replied, "Last night, I told Fujimoto that—that it was my family's name too."

"Why do you think that?"

"Because when I hear it, I'm not just angry. There's something warm around my heart, and it's like I want to cry…"

"Like a 'squeeze'?" Kohaku said, touching a finger to her chin.

Kariya looked at her in surprise. "I—I guess…but how did you know?"

Kohaku smiled, staring up at the ceiling. "That's what I feel when I think about Shuichiro," she explained, "I think it means a special kind of love where all you want is for someone to be happy. Nothing else really matters, as long as they're happy."

"Yes, that's it!" A smile broke out across Kariya's face as well. The pressure on his cheek sent a searing pain through his head, but it didn't matter. "You're right," he said, "I just want them to be happy." The pain forced his smile away, but the 'squeeze' still tightened around his heart. Another tear escaped his eye.

"I think I have two little sisters," he went on, "I keep thinking of them, but I can't quite remember…" He closed his eyes, trying with all his might to bring back the image of the two little girls' faces, but it was like before: the harder he tried to remember, the more the memory eluded him. "I also had a good dream this morning," he went on, opening his eyes again because closing them seemed to make it worse, "there was this woman with gentle eyes. When I saw her, I felt like I was at home, and I wanted her to be here, but now I can barely remember what she looked like."

"Your mother?" Kohaku guessed.

Kariya shook his head. "That's what I thought too, but it doesn't seem quite right," he said.

"What about the girls?"

"She's their mother," Kariya said abruptly.

"But not yours? Are they really your sisters, then?"

"I don't know. Maybe not, but they kind of feel like sisters. I want to protect them, like a big brother."

"Maybe you're their cousin," Kohaku suggested.

"That could be it," Kariya replied, "It's all so confusing. I think my name is Matou, but the person I remember with that name doesn't feel like family. 'Tohsaka' reminds me of family, but it also makes me feel angry."

"Could that man you described be the girls' father?

"He's no father to her!" Kariya shouted suddenly, his fists clenching. Pain like a thousand needles seared him and the worm in the cup suddenly sprung to its flying form, baring its fangs at Kohaku with a squeal.

Kohaku started back in surprise, but she remained calm. "I understand," she said softly.

"How could you understand?" Kariya cried, the last word rising to a harsh scream as his pain intensified. Images flashed through his mind, but each one was gone before he could process it. "I didn't kill him!" he screamed, his grip on his knees growing tighter and tighter. His fingernails dug into his legs, but there was so much agony ripping through him by now, he couldn't even tell the difference. "Didn't kill her! Everything—I endured, endured, endured, endured, I promised they'd be happy, I promised, it doesn't matter, but all of this, all this, endured—" Kariya was mumbling and babbling incoherently, now, tears pouring down his cheeks. All he could feel was his hands, tightening, tightening around his knees. All he could hear was the deafening silence—and the choking—

"No!" he shrieked, his eyes snapping open. And suddenly, something burst in his left eye. There was an explosive, excruciating pain, a flash or red, and then blackness in that eye. "It wasn't me!" he yelled, as people rushed in around him, "I saved her! I saved her! I didn't—" Kobato's face appeared in his field of vision, and he fell silent, all the muscles in his body going limp. "Sakura…chan…" he said faintly as he collapsed back onto the bed, "Let's go see Mommy now, okay?"

Chapter Seven: "Sakura"

When Kariya woke up, and inexpressible sadness weighed on his heart. He felt weak and numb all over, and darkness shrouded him. Turning his head, he saw an IV trailing into his arm, and when he looked a little higher, Kobato's worried face came into focus.

"Thank goodness, you're awake," she whispered. She took a little paper cup and a glass of water from the bedside table. "Domoto-san told me to give you your medicine when you woke up, and we have some food for you too, see? Kiyokazu made rice porridge just for you."

"I don't want it," Kariya said, staring back up at the ceiling. There was a dim lamp by his bedside, and it cast a soft, orange circle on the ceiling, running together with the glow from the streetlights outside. It was strangely dark on the left side of his face. Reaching a hand toward his left eye. Kariya realized that it had gone blind.

"I bet the medicine makes you feel sick," Kobato replied, "And maybe you don't feel very hungry, but the rice porridge is easy to digest. I'm sure if you eat a little, you'll feel better—"

"Stop it." Kariya pressed his eyes shut. "I…I want to die."

A heavy silence fell over everything. Squeezing his eyes even more tightly shut, Kariya fought back the tears that had become so ready to fall these past few days. He didn't want to look at Kobato's face, or see the horror in her eyes. He didn't want her to tell him that everything would be all right.

When the silence continued, Kariya found he couldn't hide any longer. He opened his eyes and ventured a glance at Kobato. She was staring down at the pills and water in her hands, tears running down her cheeks. However, when she noticed he was looking at her, she raised her eyes to him and tried to smile. "Hey…Kariya-kun," she said quietly, "If you die, you won't be able to keep your promise, right?"

Kariya drew in a shuddering breath that sounded like a sob. "I won't be able to anyway," he replied, "Kohaku-san is right; I'm not from this world. All my memories are from somewhere else. I—I can't go back."

"Please take this!" Kobato thrusted the pills toward him. Before he could push them away, they were in his hands, and Kobato was putting the bowl of rice porridge in his lap. "You have to get better, Kariya-kun. Even if you can't find your family again, then _we_ can be a family!"

Kariya met her determined gaze with wide eyes. It hurt ot hear her say that. Deep inside, it hurt, but it was beautiful at the same time. It was a kind of beauty he had never known before. He didn't know how to respond.

"Eat! Please!" Kobato begged. Not knowing what else to do, Kariya swallowed the pills quickly. Then he bent his head over the rice porridge and took a small bite. It was still warm, with a hint of sweetness. Even the first bite revived him somewhat. He ate a little more.

"Thank you," Kobato sighed, wiping away her tears with the back of her hand. She was quiet for a while as he continued eating, then, hesitantly, she said, "You look very different now."

Kariya looked up. "What do you mean?"

"All your hair turned white today," Kobato explained, speaking quickly and nervously, "And your face is grayer than before, and very tired, and the veins are standing out more. Also, since your eye got hurt this morning, it's turned gray. There was blood coming out of it when you passed out. Shuichiro-san had to operate."

"I can't see through that eye anymore," Kariya said.

"I'm so sorry…"

Kariya took a few more bites of porridge. The bowl was almost empty. After another pause, he quietly asked, "Can I see it? My—my face?"

"Oh—" Reaching into her pale blue purse, which was hanging on the back of her chair, Kobato pulled out a small, round hand mirror. She flipped it open and gave it to Kariya.

His hand trembled a little when he held the mirror up to his face. It was just as Kobato had described: pale and week with glinting, silver hair and a sightless, gray eye. The thought crossed Kariya's mind that he looked like a ghost. It seemed like he could be blown away by a breath of wind. "Do you still have my hoodie?" he said.

Kobato jumped up and ran to the corner where they were keeping a small bag of Kariya's clothes. She dug through it until she found the hoodie and then brought it back to hm. It was dark blue—almost gray—with a wide, silver stripe running down each sleeve.

Kariya pulled the hoodie on, his arms stinging as he did so. Then he looked at himself in the mirror again. That was a little better. His neck and shoulders didn't seem quite so thin, though the darkness of the fabric stood out against his skin, making him look even paler. Reaching over his head, he grasped the hood and pulled it up so that it shadowed his face. This was worse. His eyes were shaded in deep darkness, and what was left looked almost like a demon grinning out of a black pit. He pulled the hood down again.

Kobato was saying something about how Domoto and Shuichiro were still trying to find a way to kill the worms, but Kariya continued to stare at his face in the mirror. Seeing himself like this made memories simmer on the edge of his consciousness, just out of reach. He felt that it would only take a single word for him to break through this veil and remember everything. He looked so much older now, though he was still the size of a child. He looked like he had back then.

Finally folding the mirror, Kariya set it on the bedside table and drew the bowl of porridge forward on his lap. As he ate the last few bites, he realized that Kobato had fallen silent again. When he finished, she took the bowl from him and set it on the table beside the mirror, her eyes lowered and a sad, thoughtful expression on her face. Then she raised her gaze to his face and ventured, "You…you said something to me when you passed out earlier today, but I didn't think you were talking to me. It sounded like you thought I was someone else."

"What did I say?" Kariya asked.

"Well…" Kobato began hesitantly, "You told me, 'Let's go see Mommy now, okay?' Like you were talking to a child."

Kariya's heart pounded in his chest, and he leaned toward her eagerly. "Did I say anything else?" Something told him that this was it: this was the word by which he could break through the veil.

"Yes, you called me by a name I didn't recognize," Kobato replied, "Though now that I think about it, I remember you said it in the alley too, when I first found you. You called me 'Sakura-chan'."

"Sakura—"

For an instant, Kariya was frozen. Then his eyes widened and his lips trembled. He struggled, shaking his head and raising his chin as a few tears escaped his eyes. Then suddenly he broke down weeping. So many emotions converged and twisted in his heart: deep affection, tenderness, happiness, nostalgia—but then longing, loss, grief, and empathy—such burning, aching empathy, he felt his heart would break. He clutched at the bed sheets, bending over under the weight of it all.

"_Sakura-chan!_"

The image of a dear little girl rose in his mind. She was small and sleight for her age, her chin-length hair violet and tied slightly back on one side with the red ribbon her sister had given her. Her clothes were purple, as were her eyes in her pale, solemn face. But what eyes! They were glazed over and so lost, but the slightest spark of hope glowed behind them, trembling in her thin voice. "Will I see Mommy again…and Rin-chan?"

With the memory of this child, Kariya understood all at once why he had been willing to endure such agony. There had been a time when he had held her as a baby, a time when he had seen her running around as a happy toddler with her fiery-spirited sister, Rin. He remembered all the many times they had played in the sunny park together while their beautiful mother, Aoi, looked on with a gentle smile.

He wasn't their brother or their cousin; he was like their father.

His soul wasn't the soul of a child.

"She used to call me her uncle," he told Kobato when he at last began to calm himself. His voice broke. "I wasn't really even related to the family, but I had loved her mother once. Sometimes I even thought they could have been my kids if I had made a different decision—she had a sister, Rin-chan, too. But Aoi-san had seemed happy marrying Tokiomi Tohsaka, and I thought her children would be safer with him than with me. My family—Matou—was too powerful for me. We were a line of mages, and the patron was looking for an heir after I had refused to carry the family's magic. Matou was an evil family. I wouldn't have inherited their magic for anything. The Tohsaka family were mages too, but I never thought—" He broke off, wiping his tears away, but they continued to fall. His young voice sounded so strange to him now, and his words didn't seem to match it.

"What happened?" Kobato asked quietly, clasping her hands tightly on her lap.

"Tokiomi gave Sakura-chan away—to the Matou family!" Kariya shouted, his eyes burning with anger. Then his gaze dropped and his voice fell. "Sakura-chan…Rin-chan…Aoi-san…they were the first family I knew. I had rejected my own family. I'd always been running from it. But with them, I—I got to play in the park. We could just be happy together on a summer's day without any darkness at all. But when I came to the park one day, Sakura-chan wasn't there. I asked where she was and found out she'd been given away to the Matous. The patron of my family—Zouken Matou—wanted to use her as the magical heir, but I knew what that meant." His breath quickened, and he grasped at his hoodie over his heart. "It meant putting her down in the worm pit—th-that awful place from my nightmares. The source of Matou magic is those worms. To be their heir, she had to be v-violated by them…infected with them. I ran over there right away to stop them, but I was too late."

"Oh, Kariya-kun, that's so sad!" Kobato cried. She stood up and held his head to her chest in a hug, but he couldn't stop telling his story. It was all coming back at once, and he had to say it all, no matter how horrible it was.

"I agreed to do whatever Zouken asked if he would let her go," he went on, "He wanted to win a secret war that was to be fought by seven people around the world—one of them being Tokiomi. These people summoned servants from the past to fight for them, using magic to power them, so all I had to do…was take on the magic to power a servant. I only had to take the worms myself, and hope they wouldn't kill me with the strain of the battles…and hope my servant would win. Zouken would only let Sakura-chan go if I won."

"So that's why you dreamed you were letting them and not fighting them," Kobato said.

Kariya nodded and clung to her, shutting his eyes. "I just wanted it to stop. I couldn't bear the thought of Sakura-chan being down there. I just wanted her out. I wanted her safe and at home with Aoi-san and Rin-chan…happy again. When I saw her, I…she was so different…lost and broken...it should've never been that way. I promised her that I would get her out of there, so she could go home to Mommy and Rin-chan. Then we'd go somewhere far away and have fun together, like we used to."

"It's your promise," Kobato said. Her voice squeaked a little at the end, and Kariya heard a sniffle from above him. A tear fell down on his face.

Feeling like he wanted to comfort her, Kariya realized he was smiling. "It's okay," he said, "I never really thought I would survive it all, but I think I did save her." There was a hole in his memory now, but he didn't say so. He could remember everything up to confronting Tokiomi and getting blasted with fire, and then there was only one more, fragmented memory.

"I met her on the stairs down to the worm pit," he said, "I told her we were going home to see Mommy and Rin-chan, but I felt so weak. I think I'd just won, and all the energy was drained out of me. But then I remember seeing them together—Sakura-chan and Rin-chan—and they were so happy. And Aoi-san was there…and they even called me 'Daddy'…I think Tokiomi must have died in the war…" His voice trailed off in confusion, as though his string of thoughts had reached a knot and couldn't go on. Something didn't fit.

"Why are you here, then?" Kobato asked, voicing his thoughts.

"I must have…I must have been too weak to survive much longer…" Kariya faltered, "But I left them together, I know I did."

"You kept your promise."

"Yeah, I…kept it."

"That's wonderful!" Kobato sighed.

Then she was silent.

Kariya sat back and saw with a start that she still seemed sad. He swallowed back his apprehension. He had seen them together again. He was sure he had seen them, so nothing else really mattered. It would be okay.

When she spoke, Kobato's voice broke the silence like the single chime of a small bell: "So you didn't kill anyone?"

Kariya's breath caught in his throat. "No, I…I didn't kill Tokiomi," he breathed, his heart pounding in his ears, "It wasn't me." A dark memory flashed back to him. He stood in a dimly-lit chapel and grabbed the man's shoulder, so angry that he had given Sakura away.

Tokiomi fell down dead.

Sakura's father. Dead.

"It wasn't me," Kariya repeated in a whisper, staring at the wall, "He was already dead. Someone else must've done it."

"And you didn't kill 'her' either?"

"Her…?"

"When you passed out this morning, you were very upset…you said you didn't kill her."

Kariya's hands tightened around the white blanket. "I loved them," he muttered shakily, "I loved…I endured…I—I would've given anything just so they could be happy. So then why…"

His eyes burned, wide and staring, but no tears came. "But she was there when I took Sakura home," he said, "I remember her being there, so it's not possible."

The silence was heavy around him, He couldn't even hear his heart anymore. Was he even still breathing?

_It's not true._ In his mind, he raised his eyes from Tokiomi's dead body on the chapel floor.

_You're wrong._ The woman with gentle eyes was in the doorway, staring at him. He hadn't done it. All he had ever done was love. He had hated, hated, hated, but only because he had loved. Deep down, he had loved. This was Sakura's father…it wasn't right for him to be dad.

She was screaming at him…dearest Aoi…He had given up everything for her, and she had never known.

She said it was his fault.

His fault that her husband was dead.

His fault that she had lost Sakura.

His fault.

His fault.

_You never loved anyone!_

Her final accusation was swallowed up in silence. A single word pounded through his head: _Endured, endured, endured, endured, endured…_Everything he had suffered for nothing.

A quiet choking broke the silence. His hands tightened, tightened, to silence it. There was a struggling beneath him.

_No,_ his heart wept, _no, no, no, no, no…_

The struggling ceased. Gentle eyes stared up without expression.

A despairing wail tore from Kariya's throat.

A scream of utter lostness.

Chapter Eight: "The Most Wounded Heart"

Kobato held Kariya tightly, her head against his chest as he wept.

"What happened?" she whispered.

"I murdered her," Kariya choked, clutching at Kobato's hair so that it twisted through his fingers, "Sakura's mommy—I strangled her. She—she told me I never loved anyone!"

"That's so sad," Kobato said, and Kariya could feel her pressing her cheek against his chest, holding him tighter and tighter as though somehow she could sink into him and heal his wounded heart. "It's so sad. You really loved them. Truly, truly…you loved them."

At her words, Kariya's weeping rose to a scream. He grasped blindly at her, tears streaming from his eyes. With the realization that Aoi was dead, he also saw that his memory of a promise kept had been a lie. A delusion. He hadn't won. He hadn't gotten Sakura out of that horrible place. He had taken her mother away from her, and in the end, he had fallen dead into the worm pit. He could still remember the sensation of them consuming him, from the inside and the outside—an agony too great to even be felt as pain anymore.

No, everything was a lie. Even his promise was a lie. The only thing that was real were his fingers tightening around Aoi's throat.

Clinging to Kobato, he wept and wept and could not be comforted.

Perhaps one other thing was real: the sound of Kobato's own sobbing in his ears.

There were other people in the room now. They had heard him and had come to see what was wrong, but they weren't real. They didn't matter. Sakura mattered. Sakura, Sakura, Sakura…Kariya's heart stretched out desperately for her, but she turned away coldly. There was nothing left to fight for.

_I didn't save her._

Kariya's voice rose to a scream again. The thought of Sakura left there all alone sent fresh waves of agony through his heart, blending with the agony that ripped through his body as worms responded to his emotion with razor-backed fury. No one was there to love her anymore. Blood spurted from the veins in his face, mingling with his tears.

Someone was trying to pull him away from Kobato.

"_No!_"

Kariya grabbed desperately for her, seizing hold of her sleeve, her hair…His heart was irreparably shattered, but Kobato still offered the tiniest light. She understood. Only she understood that he had always loved.

Hands pried Kariya's fingers out of Kobato's hair, and she fell away from him. Gone like Sakura. Like Aoi. He was shoved down against the hospital bed, but he continued to thrash and shriek. He felt a mask pressing around his nose and mouth. Then his muscles gave way, his struggling died, and he tumbled into a deep sleep.

An amber light glinted from above him. Kariya forced his eyes open a little more, and Kohaku's face appeared. He shut them again.

"Where's Kobato-chan?"

"She's here," came the reply.

A tiny layer of peace descended over Kariya's chest. He was silent, his eyes still closed, horrible images of Sakura and Aoi flashing through his imagination.

"She told me everything," Kohaku said after a while.

Kariya looked at her again. Everything had fallen away. In the place of his heart was a deep hole, and he felt nothing. "I strangled Mommy." He said dully.

Kohaku's eyes closed as though she was absorbing the grief of this sentence. It was a sacred horror. She was quiet for a long while. Then, without opening her eyes again, she said, "Nothing, whether in this world or any other, happens without a reason."

Kariya didn't reply. Maybe Kohaku would know. She was an angel. But right now, he didn't care about reasons. "I just want Sakura-chan to be happy with her family again," he said at last, "I promised."

"We're finite creatures; we can't always keep our promises," Kohaku said.

"I don't care!" Kariya shouted, "It wasn't supposed to be this way!"

His outburst sank into yet another contemplative silence from Kohaku and fell flat. He leaned back against the raised head of his bed, exhausted.

"What I want to understand is the reason why you were reincarnated into this world," Kohak said thoughtfully, "Perhaps it was so you could find a family again?"

"But it's not about me," Kariya protested feebly, "There's nothing I want except for Sakura-chan to be happy and safe with her family. I wish I could be with them, but I don't need a new family. I don't want a different family."

"I see," Kohaku said. She stood up from her chair.

"Where are you going?" Kariya asked.

"I'm going to see if we can find a way to keep your promise," she said with a smile. Before he could respond, she turned and went out the door, leaving him bewildered.

"Even so…" he murmured.

"Kariya-kun," Kobato's airy voice piped from nearer the foot of the bed. When Kariya looked, he saw she was smiling brightly.

"Kariya-kun," she repeated, "I don't know if I can heal your heart." Her lips trembled slightly, and a tear escaped her eye, but she swallowed hard and kept smiling.

As she was speaking, Domoto came in, carrying a tray of warm meat and vegetables. Without a word, he set it down on the bedside stand and lowered the table, turning it so that it was over the head of the bed. He then raised the head as far as it would go and sat down beside Kariya. Fujimoto had come in as well, and he sat next to Kobato, seeming unsure what to say.

Kariya pulled his hood over his head and ate because he was supposed to. The food sat in his stomach like a rock, He could hear scratching in his head and feel squirming in his gut.

"We haven't found any way to kill the worm we got out of you," Domoto began, and his tone was like a doctor diagnosing cancer, "We've tried everything we can think of."

"It's a Crest Worm; you won't be able to kill it," Kariya replied. "Well, you could burn it."

"We can't burn the ones inside you."

"I know."

"You know more about it than I do." Domoto spoke to Kariya now as to an adult. "Will they kill you?"

"Zouken wanted me dead, so…yeah. They probably will."

"We could try surgery."

Kariya shook his head. "They're everywhere. Where would you even start?"

Domoto lowered his eyes to the floor with a brief nod, leaning forward with his arms on his knees. "We'll find a way to treat this," he said, "Or at least to control it."

"You can't control it," Kariya said, bending his head over his food, "Please, just let me go. I don't want to die here."

"You have the right to refuse treatment."

"Then I refuse treatment."

"Wait—" Fujimoto jumped up, clenching his fist. "Don't we have a say in this?" he demanded, "He's a minor!"

"We've learned that he's much older than he looks," Domoto replied gently, "He can make his own decisions. You aren't even his legal guardians."

Fujimoto let his arm drop. "You're right," he admitted in a low voice, "But we should be. He doesn't have any legal guardians, and we were the ones who found him. We were the ones who brought him in. We should have a say in this."

"Kiyokazu," Kobato said, catching hold of his sleeve. He looked down at her, and she smiled, standing up.

Fujimoto glanced back toward Domoto. "Please give us a minute," he said, and they went out of the room together.

Pushing his plate away, Kariya sat back against the bed again. He couldn't eat anymore; his stomach churned, and there was a pain in his gut.

"Are you sure you don't want to keep trying to treat it?" Domoto asked quietly.

Kariya shook his head. "If they're going to let me live, they will. If not, they won't. We're not going to get them out of me." He looked over at Domoto. "But you're the doctor. Shouldn't you be trying harder to make me accept treatment?"

"Honestly, I don't think there's anything I can do at this point," he replied.

"Mhm."

"That was a noble thing you did," Domoto said.

"Wh-what was?"

"Giving up Aoi-san…back when she wanted to marry someone else. Kobato-chan told me your story."

Tears stung Kariya's eyes. "She never even knew."

"I don't think Kobato-chan knew either."

"Huh?"

"I did the same thing," Domoto explained, smiling sadly, "With Kobato-chan. I saw that she loved Kiyokazu-kun, so I let her go. You made the right decision."

"I don't think I did. I thought she would be safer in the Tohsaka family, but I was wrong."

"But if she had never married him, Sakura-chan and Rin-chan would have never been born, right?"

That was true. Kariya's heart burned for an instant, but then he thought again of what he had done. He had destroyed everything. "I killed her," he said, "None of it matters anymore."

"It all matters," Domoto replied.

Just then, Kobato and Fujimoto returned.

"We'll let him be discharged from the hospital, if that's still what he wants," Fujimoto said, "And we'll be taking him home with us."

"Please…" Kariya began, but his voice rose and trailed off as a thousand aching emotions squeezed his heart. If there was anything he still wanted, it was to go back to that house of wishes come true, but the thought of that same place was terrible, because his own wish could never come true.

"Is there any paperwork we need to fill out?" Fujimoto asked. Domoto rose to help them.

As they walked home, Kariya could still feel the imprint of Domoto's hug against his shoulders and Shuichiro's hand on his head. He could still hear the gentle, young doctor's breathy voice as he wished him all the best.

He could also still feel his own hands around Aoi's throat.

Because it hurt too much for Kariya to walk on his own, Fujimoto carried him. Kobato walked alongside, thoughtful, smiling every once in a while, and fighting back tears. When they came back home, the sun was just beginning to set, casting a soft, pink light over everything: the pale yellow walls, the green grass and trees, and the sakura petals drifting to the ground. Petals swirled out of the way as they climbed up onto the porch and went inside.

_They don't want to be near me, _Kariya thought.

Fujimoto set Kariya down on the flower-printed couch in the living room, then headed to the kitchen to make green tea and rice porridge. No one was really hungry.

Pain had become a constant for Kariya by now. Even as he sat there, it scraped through his lungs, clustered behind his eyes, and pounded in his arms and legs. Leaning back against the sofa with his hood up, he held his left arm, which hurt more. He had given up reacting to the pain, only whimpering slightly when it worsened unexpectedly.

Kobato sat beside him, her hands fidgeting in her lap. "You loved them. You always loved them," she ventured after a while.

Blinking back tears, Kariya replied, "Please don't say that anymore." She was looking for a way to heal his heart, he knew, and repeating the only thing she thought might help. But it wouldn't change anything. Exhausted, he stared at the ceiling and focused in on the pains and nauseating movements of the worms inside him, torturing himself with the thought that this was what he had left Sakura alone in. He didn't want to turn away from that truth or forget it for an instant. If he did, it would be like no longer caring about her.

One cruel hope still mocked him. Kohaku had said she was going to find a way for them to keep his promise. What could that be, since it was already over. Even if he could go back to this world, he had already broken his deal with Zouken. Even if he could go back in time, wouldn't he simply fail again? He was helpless. "What do you think she meant?" he murmured under his breath.

"Hmm? Who?" Kobato asked curiously.

"Kohaku-san…She said she would find a way for me to keep my promise."

"That's wonderful," Kobato said, relief in her voice. Hope for her was never cruel.

"Do you have any idea what she means?"

"No," Kobato admitted, her face falling. A moment later, she raised one finger, looking up with a determined smile. "Oh, but—but Kohaku-san knows much more about other worlds than we do. Maybe she has a way to find out what happened in your world after you left."

Kariya's stomach clenched suddenly, and he doubled over, shivers wracking his body. His breath came in short gasps. Panic traveled through his veins like electricity, causing the worms inside to bristle.

"Kariya-kun! What's wrong?" Kobato cried, grabbing his shoulders.

"I don't—want to know—what happened," Kariya gasped. Yet at the same time he did. He wanted to know more than anything. To see the unbearable results of what he had done and what he had failed to do. Anxiety raked at his belly more viciously than the worms, and he threw up abruptly, half-digested vegetables and shrieking, egg-sized worms splattering onto the carpet.

"I'm sorry!" Kobato cried, leaping to her feet. She stood paralyzed with terror for a moment, then sprinted toward the kitchen, shouting something about cleaning it up. At the doorway, she tripped and crashed face-first into the ground but she got up without missing a beat and vanished into the kitchen.

There were five or six worms in the vomit, and one turned and launched itself into Kariya's panting mouth before he had a chance to react. It slipped down his throat as the others rose into the air and buzzed at his face—his nose, his ears, his eyes. Instinctively, he shielded himself, but it didn't faze them at all.

Fujimoto appeared at the door and ran to him, but by then the worms had already found their way back in. Pressing his hands to the sides of his head, Kariya gulped desperately, trying to make the one in his ear move to his throat. The pain there was intolerable. When it finally did slip down his throat, he slumped onto his side, shaking all over. Fujimoto sat beside him and lifted him firmly onto his lap.

"What happened?"

"I want to know what happened," Kariya whimpered, clutching at Fujimoto's wrist, "I don't want to know."

Kobato reappeared in the doorway, a bucket of water clasped in her hands. Hurrying over, she knelt down and pulled a dripping rag out of the bucket. Wringing it out, she began to wipe the vomit up from the carpet.

"I'm sorry," Kariya muttered. He was still shuddering.

"No, I'm really sorry," Kobato replied, bending her head over her work, "I'm always saying stupid things…right, Kiyokazu."

"You don't have to believe everything's your fault," Fujimoto responded in a low voice, "That's what's stupid."

Kobato finished cleaning up the mess in silence and returned to the kitchen. During this time, Kariya's eyes closed, and he began to sink into sleep, but Fujimoto spoke suddenly in his ear, jolting him awake. "The tea should be ready. Do you still want it?"

"Yeah," Kariya said weakly.

Fujimoto carried him into the kitchen and placed him gently in a chair. While he was pouring the steaming green tea out of a china teapot, Kobato returned and sat beside Kariya. The warm scent of rice in the rice cooker hung in the air, nostalgic and calming. _I want to know,_ Kariya told himself, trying to control his rapid breathing, _I want to know what happened._

Kariya ate only a few bites of rice porridge, but even that managed to soothe his anxiety somewhat. After dinner, it was already late, so they got ready for bed. This time, there was no question where Kariya would be sleeping. Placing him in the center of their bed, Fujimoto took off his glasses while Kobato tucked him in. He rolled onto his right side because his left hurt too much, hiding the more normal half of his face and exposing the frightening half.

Slipping under the covers, Kobato held him like a teddy bear, her face pressed into his back. Fujimoto then turned off the light and got in on the other side. For the first time, he faced inward, his olive gaze resting sadly on Kariya's face. He placed a hand on the back of Kariya's head.

There was a single, quiet sob from Kobato.

Kariya let his head tilt forward slightly, leaning his forehead against Fujimoto's chest. He wanted to cry but couldn't.

They loved him.

This was what he had wished for Sakura, not himself. It was all wrong.

Chapter Nine: "…A Promise Kept"

Kariya didn't sleep much that night. Every time he did, his dreams took him back to that awful choking. When he was awake, pain, grief, and anxious thoughts kept him awake. Yet he was exhausted. Sleep kept taking him suddenly and releasing him violently. It was a long and horrible night.

Even so, in a small way, the warmth of Fujimoto and Kobato on either side still reached him.

When light at last began to stream in through the window, Kariya sat up and inched his way stiffly to the edge of the bed. He slid off onto the floor, his legs nearly giving way beneath him, but he managed to recover himself somewhat and limped out the door, clutching his arm. Gradually, he made his way down the stairs and into the front living room, where the grand piano stood, facing the window. Collapsing on the sofa, he turned his head so that he could see out the window and watched the sakura petals drifting to the ground. The window was open, and a few petals settled on the carpet when a cool breeze stroked the curtains.

There was still something left to fight for.

Kobato's high-pitched cry of alarm echoed down the stairs, and Kariya smiled without thinking. Maybe he should have told them where he was going. The next moment, Kobato sprinted into the room. When she saw him she froze for an instant, then flew at him, clasping him in her arms. "Oh, thank goodness! I thought you were dead!"

"I won't die without telling you," Kariya replied quietly, "I…" He stopped, swallowing back the last word before it could escape his mouth. He had almost said, "I promise."

Fujimoto appeared in the doorway wearing a white t-shirt, but when he had looked the situation over and decided everything was all right, he went back out, scratching his neck.

The doorbell chimed melodically. Letting Kariya down gently onto the sofa, Kobato ran to answer it. Left alone again, Kariya turned toward the window. The sky was overcast, but it glowed amber in the light of the rising sun.

Kohaku's calm voice floated in from the hallway, and Kariya fought down nausea. Was she here to tell him what had happened to Sakura after he died? Or was it something else? Whatever it was, he didn't want to throw up again. Sharp pains prickled through his veins, and he took deep breaths.

Soon, Kohaku stepped into the room. She was smiling, and Ioryogi sat on her shoulder, his plush arms folded. Kobato came in behind her.

"Good morning, Kariya-kun," Kohaku said, her voice as optimistic and polite as ever, "I've found someone who I want you to meet."

As she spoke, she turned to the side, and a tall, slim young man stepped in, carrying an odd creature on his shoulder. The man was wearing a sleek, white-and-blue outfit that emphasized his lanky figure. His eyes were bright blue, matching the blue of his clothes, and they slanted outward in a permanent, carefree expression. His hair was blonde and toustled, tied partially back in a short, loose ponytail. The creature on his shoulder at first looked like another talking stuffed toy, like Ioryogi, but something about it seemed more like a real animal. It was white and egg-shaped, about the size of the young man's head, and it had a large, red, round jewel right in the center of its forehead. Otherwise, it looked somewhat like a rabbit with pointed, floppy ears that hung all the way down to its long, rounded feet and short little arms. Its eyes were long and appeared cheerfully closed. It had no nose, but it did have a smiling, cat-like mouth. There was a golden earring with a bright, blue jewel near the bottom of its right ear.

"Kariya-kun, this is Fai D. Flowright and Mokona Modoki," Kohaku introduced them, "They are from a small group of Travelers who journey between different realms."

Kariya's eyes widened slightly, and his heartbeat quickened even more. With a spring in his step, Fai came over and sat beside him, Mokona hopping off onto Kariya's lap.

"I've heard a lot about you," Fai said. His voice was incredibly light and smooth, so totally carefree—it seemed—that Kariya shrank back from him inside. This rift between them was so great, it truly felt like Fai could only be from a different universe.

"Normally, the universes these Travelers end up in is random," Ioryogi explained gruffly, "But I can travel between Ningenkai—this world—and Ikai—the spirit world—freely. So when Kohaku-san contacted me, I was able to pull a few strings to land them here."

"Even then, we weren't certain whether they had been to your world," Kohaku said, "However, there is a purpose for you being here like this, Kariya-kun. I believe it more than ever now."

"I suppose where we end up isn't as random as it looks from below," Fai said airily, putting his hands behind his head and leaning back, "You're infected with Crest Worms, aren't you?"

"Yes," Kariya replied anxiously, leaning forward and subconsciously squeezing Mokona in his arms.

"A descendent of Zouken Matou?"

"Y-yes…"

"Then I've been there," Fai decided, tilting his head slightly to look down at Kariya with a smile, "In fact, I met the sweetest young woman there named Sakura Emiya."

"Emiya—" Kariya stammered, his heart dropping. He recognized the name, but it told him that this couldn't be Sakura. There were other Sakuras in the world: it was even a common name. "It's not her," he said.

"Well-ll, that was her married name," Fai drawled, "She was married to a nice young man and I never caught her maiden name, but she had told me so much about her Uncle Kariya, I kind of assumed she was the same girl Kohaku-san mentioned."

"Wait," Kariya gasped, hardly daring to believe it, "How old was she? What did she look like?"

Fai smiled at him like he was laughing inside. "She was in her twenties," he replied, "with long, violet hair like I never saw on anyone else in the world. She always wore a red ribbon in her hair and was very solemn and quiet, unlike her sister Rin-san."

"Rin…" Kariya repeated, trembling.

"Rin-san was always sitting on me," Mokona burbled in a squeaky, pouting voice. Kariya started. He hadn't heart it talk yet, but supposed he should've expected as much. "They were all very nice, though," the creature went on, brightening up and waving its stubby arms, "Rin-san, Sakura-san, Shirou-san, Rider-san…They let us stay at their house while we were there."

"But how—" Kariya looked to Kobato for help, but a reluctant smile played on his face.

"We don't know how long it was between when you died in your world and appeared in ours," Kobato said eagerly, hurrying over and kneeling beside the sofa to take his hand, "Many things could have happened in between."

"What did Sakura-chan say about me?" Kariya asked.

"When she first mentioned you, she said she wished you could have been there. You and Aoi-san."

Kariya's heart, which felt like it had been coming together, suddenly tore apart again as an unbearable pain sliced through it. "She doesn't know…" he muttered, bending low over his knees, "Maybe even Rin-chan doesn't know…I murdered her mother."

"Hmm?" Fai's eyebrows shot up in a quizzical expression, "I didn't hear anything about their mother being murdered. She had died a few years earlier, of an illness. Her health had been weak ever since someone tried to choke her—was that 'someone' you?" He gave an unfittingly coy smile, but Kariya barely noticed, staring at him and trying to comprehend what he was saying.

Fai leaned back again, pulling his feet up onto the sofa and crossing his legs with his hands around his ankles. "Anywho, Sakura-san wished you were there. She wanted to thank you. She had been raised and abused by a bad family, you see, who wanted to make her believe she was worthless. Although she believed it most of the time, she could never quite think so one-hundred percent. It was because she remembered from her childhood a certain fool who had given up everything for her when he never had to. A fool who had even died for her. If she was worth nothing, then why had he done it? She kept the red ribbon Rin-san had given her because that fool hadn't let her forget her sister, even when Zouken told her to pretend her family never existed. The same fool had promised her that someday, she would be together with her family again. So when Sakura-san finally had a chance to escape that life, she took it. She took it because she still believed she was worth something, because she hadn't forgotten her sister, and because she was holding on to a promise that they would be together again someday. That's why she wished she could thank you."

"Oh, do you understand?" Kobato cried, clasping Kariya's hands joyfully with tears sparkling in her eyes, "Sakura-chan is happy now because of you! You kept your promise! You kept it! And you didn't even kill anyone! Aoi-san survived!"

"I—I—" Kariya stammered, his mouth hanging open and tears gathering in the corners of his eyes, "Did I—"

"Yes! You did!" Kobato cheered, pulling him into a tight, jubilant hug and squishing Mokona between them. Suddenly, everything broke free. Kariya burst into tears, but these tears were different than before. He wailed like a small child—crying freely, freely as all his agony was released. Burying his face in Kobato's shoulder, he cried even more, happy…trying to remember how to be happy. "I kept my promise," he repeated as his joyful tears began to quiet down, "I kept it…I kept it!" He couldn't believe those words were coming out of his own mouth. A joy stronger than his grief had ever been overtook him. It was so strong, he didn't know what to do with it.

In that moment, a blue-green glow suddenly appeared over his chest, growing brighter and brighter with a sound of bells on the wind. Kobato sat back on her knees, understanding dawning on her face. By then, Fujimoto was in the room as well, and for the first time, Kariya saw him smile freely.

As they watched, a tiny, round object—the size of a bead—drifted out from Kariya's chest and hovered, surrounded by the blue-green light. It looked almost like a little candy, blue-gray and covered in small bumps. Kobato held out her hands to catch it, and it fell into her palm, its light fading.

"Kariya-kun's…kompeito," she breathed, her voice trembling with wonder and delight. She held it to her chest and closed her eyes with the warmest smile he had ever seen.

"What does it mean?" Kariya asked shakily.

"It means your heart is healed," Kobato replied, sniffling and wiping away her tears with the kompeito still held tight in her hand, "Your heart is healed, right?"

Kariya pressed a hand to his chest. For as long as he cold remember, ever since he had heard about Sakura-chan being given to the Matou family, there had been a pain there. The pain had grown and grown, but now he couldn't find it anymore. "It's gone," he said aloud, "The—the hurt in my heart…it went away."

"Wooowwww," Mokona squealed from Kariya's lap, fidgeting, "This is the happiest thing I've seen in a thousand years!"

Fai blinked at him. "How old _are_ you anyway?"

"You'll never know," Mokona quipped.

"Oi," Fujimoto said, folding his arms, "The tea is getting cold."

"Oh!" Kobato leapt to her feet, bowing deeply and rapidly several times to everyone in the room. "You are all very welcome to join us for tea!" she invited with feverish politeness.

"Well, I'm in," Fai replied.

"Hey…" Kariya caught hold of Kobato's sleeve, and when she turned to look at him, he smiled. "After breakfast, let's all go somewhere fun together," he said, "Right, Kobato-chan?"

"Right!" Kobato exclaimed.

Since Kariya's physical pain from the Crest Worms hadn't changed, he was only able to eat a few bites of rice porridge again. However, when they were done, Kariya insisted on walking by himself to the nearest park. Kohaku and Ioryogi joined them, and Fai and Mokona also invited themselves.

"Kuro-pon's going to be very upset with us when we finally turn up again, isn't he?" Fai remarked to Mokona, sounding far too pleased with himself.

"Without a doubt!" Mokona agreed.

At the park, Fai and Mokona ended up taking the role of children as Fai leapt lightly onto one of the swings with Mokona on his shoulder. The others sat on the benches under a picnic shelter and watched as Fai swung standing up, a careless grin on his face. Kariya also smiled as he watched, happy memories coming back to him from when Sakura and Rin were little.

They stayed there for a long time, while Kobato told story after story of the kids at Yomogi Preschool. She talked about the time they'd played hide-and-seek together, of the time they'd collected fallen leaves from an old gingko tree, and of the time they had gone to harvest sweet potatoes. Even Kariya had a few good memories to share, and he could do so without hesitating now. It still hurt to think of Sakura stuck in the Matou household, and of Aoi struggling with poor health because of an injured throat, but even those things weren't the most important. What was important was that things were healing over there, so he could finally let them go.

While they were sitting together under the shelter, Kariya dozed off. This time, he slept contentedly with sweet dreams. When he woke to Kohaku gently shaking his shoulder, he even felt a little rested.

It was noon when Kohaku and Ioryogi took their leave, and Fai and Mokona also waved good-bye and skipped off to wherever they had come from. Fujimoto and Kobato had packed some rice balls for lunch, and Kariya managed to eat one.

As they finished lunch, Kobato suddenly gasped, clapping her hands together. "A boat!" she exclaimed, "Kariya-kun, do you remember? Kiyokazu was going to show you how to row a boat!"

"That was your idea. I never agreed to it," Fujimoto said, not looking up as he packed their leftovers into a bag.

"It's all right," Kariya put in with a faint laugh, "I'm too weak to row a boat anymore anyway."

"But we can still take you on one!" Kobato declared, "Right, Kiyokazu?"

Fujimoto raised his olive eyes to her with a glare, but then he sighed and turned to Kariya. "What do you want to do?"

"A boat sounds fun, actually," Kariya admitted, "I've never been on one before."

"Let's go, then." Fujimoto straightened up, shouldering the bag.

The park around the pond was more crowded than the other one, so Kariya had to pull up his hood to keep people from staring. However, once they were on the little rowboat, drifting out to the center of the pond, he was glad they had come. Fujimoto rowed with deep, even strokes, and Kobato splashed with a quick, erratic flailing. Soon, the whole right side of Kariya's hoodie was wet.

He wished Sakura and Rin were there. They would have loved this.

When they finally returned home, the sun was beginning to set, casting a rich, orange light across everything. As they entered the hallway, Kobato grinned shyly and announced, "I added another verse to 'Ashita Kuru Hi'—to our song. It's about Kariya-kun."

"Would you like to sing it for him?" Fujimoto presumed.

Kobato clasped her hands and looked down with a little smile. She nodded.

Carrying Kariya into the living room, Fujimoto positioned him on the sofa and went to sit at the piano.

"Kariya-kun," Kobato began, standing by the window and twirling to face him, "You've taught me some things I never truly understood before. Today, I received the kompeito from the most wounded heart." Slipping her hand from her pocket, she unfolded her fingers and revealed the softly-glowing, blue-gray kompeito. "It was like nothing I had ever seen before. I wouldn't know how to explain it, really, so I added it to the song—our song. We're a family now, Kariya-kun."

Kariya smiled, his cheeks burning. Where had all this happiness come from? He hadn't seen it anywhere near before, but now it seemed like it had been waiting for him all along.

Fujimoto picked out a few, soft chords on the piano, then began to gently play the lovely, music-box melody he had played on Kariya's first night there.

Turning toward the pink sakura tree out the window, Kobato took a quiet breath and began to sing:

"I remember summer days,

Laughter and singing and fun and play,

Children swinging in the breeze,

All the world's joy is for such as these.

Even in the darkest night,

Memories lit an unfailing light,

Through the sorrow, sin, and pain,

Love was a living and peaceful rain.

The only thing I understand,

Is love is worth sacrificing everything,

Just so they'll be happy,

Laughing together,

I'd give them each breath of my life.

In all the pain that I've endured,

There echoes a deeper, more undying love

The hope of a promise,

Simple and healing,

An unbroken promise to all!"

As Kobato's high voice faded out with the piano, Kariya felt that his cheeks were wet with tears. He reached up to touch his face, and when he brought his hand down again, he saw the tips of his fingers were red with blood.

He smiled. A gust of wind blew, sending sakura petals swirling in through the window.

"Kobato-chan," he whispered, "Fujimoto-san…thank you. I never thought I'd be this happy, but because of you, I am. I dreamed about it, but I never thought…" he faltered, more tears slipping down his gray cheeks and mingling with the blood. Where was the blood coming from? He reached up and touched his left cheek again gently, but even the lightest stroke of his fingers hurt too much for him to continue. He drew his hand back again.

"Everything I did, I thought would be useless in the end," he admitted in a low voice, "Especially after…what happened with Aoi-san…I thought I'd lost everything. I thought I'd die in darkness. I still dreamed about being together with everyone again. I still hoped, and because of that I kept fighting, but I was lost. I was empty. Now I have more than I ever could have expected. Thank you so much."

There was a 'squeeze' around his heart, and he pressed his eyes shut to hold back his persistent tears. _No,_ he thought to himself, _Don't wish for that. It will only make you sad. This is enough. Accept it._

"Kariya-kun, your eye is bleeding," Kobato said in a quiet, anxious voice, "The gray one…it's like you're crying blood."

Kariya nodded. "I know," he replied weakly, "I'm going to die soon. When I decided to save Sakura-chan, I never expected to survive. I—"

Suddenly, the front door slammed loudly, its sound echoing through the quiet house. Everyone jumped, and Fujimoto leapt to his feet. Running footsteps pounded down the hallway. A moment later, a young man sprinted into the room and stopped abruptly, facing them, his chest heaving.

It was Domoto.

"I can't do this," he gasped, striding quickly forward and kneeling in front of Kariya. His gray eyes flashed, and something about the look in his face seemed to fill the whole room with a swirling of compassion. He seized Kariya's hand. "You can't die," he said, "I won't allow it."

Kariya's heart leapt into his throat, his soul catching fire. He wanted to throw himself into Domoto's arms and beg for help, but he afraid. He didn't want to start striving again, after he had found his resolution. It was too late for him to go on living. "I have to die," he replied in a tight voice, "That's why I left the hospital. I knew I was going to die…a-and I wanted it to be here. There's nothing you can do…please don't take me back to the hospital…"

"Is that really what you want?" Domoto demanded, "To die? Now that you know that Sakura-chan is all right? You just want to leave her?" His eyes searched Kariya's face desperately.

"What are you talking about?" Kariya asked shakily, "I—I already died in her world. I already left her."

"Don't you want to be together again?"

"Stop," Kariya said, his voice breaking, "S-stop it. Just let me go, all of you. Don't make me hope anymore. I've found out that she's okay, and that's enough for me. I'm so sick of hoping. I'm tired. I'm tired. I just want to rest. I just want to let it go." He began to sob more and more as he spoke, clenching his fists and shaking his head. "I decided I was going to die from the very beginning, okay? I knew I was sacrificing everything. It's what I decided."

"Really? _You_ decided that?" came an airy voice from the doorway, and Fai stepped inside, his hands behind his head and Mokona on his shoulder. "Was it you who decided it, or was it Zouken Matou?"

Kariya's eyes widened, his tears ceased, and for a moment, he was speechless. He knew the answer. "Z-Zouken," he admitted.

"So tell me," Fai went on, walking into the room with light, careless steps, "Why do we have to do what Zouken-puri wants? Is he God? Why does he have to win?"

Kariya didn't have a reply. In silence, he stared at the faces around him. Kobato, with her depthless hope; Fujimoto, with his strong, reassuring care; and Domoto with that infectious flame of compassion in his eyes. They loved him.

Another memory rose in his mind's eye: a warm and quiet memory. He stood beside a window in the Matou mansion, looking down at dear Sakura. There was so much sadness in her little face now, and her hollow eyes were glazed over with loneliness. Love squeezed his heart. "Hey, Sakura-chan," he said, his voice bright and encouraging for her sake, "After this is over, let's all go somewhere fun together, okay?" Overwhelmed with affection, he limped forward and sank to his knees in front of her, hugging her. That was when he had made his promise.

It wasn't time to rest yet. There was still a piece of his promise left to keep.

"But what can you do?" he said to Domoto, "How can you heal me?"

"I don't know," the doctor admitted, "but we'll find a way. No matter what it takes, we'll find it.

"And we'll find out how to get you home to Sakura-san and Rin-san!" Mokona squeaked, raising her stubby paws as high as they would go.

Kobato pulled Kariya into a hug, his face against her shoulder. It was just like the hug he had given Sakura so long ago. "I want you to live, Kariya-kun," she whispered, "You'll be together with them again. I promise."

Pictures

Kobato and Fujimoto

Kobato and Ioryogi

Kariya and Sakura

Fai D. Flowright and Mokona Modoki

Sad Kobato

Mokona Modoki with MUFFINS

Kohaku

Kariya and Kobato

Kariya Sakura

Kariya

Sakura

Kariya and Sakura

Things to Note

If you want to include this in Part Two, Fai and Mokona were the ones who went and told Domoto everything that had happened that day with Kariya.

Domoto let Kariya go from the hospital originally partially because he honestly couldn't see any cure, but also because he has a problem with being unable to say "no" to anyone, even when it would benefit them. He would like to be able to say "no", but ends up doing whatever people ask him because a lot of people depend on him. That could be something he might have to work through over the course of Part Two.

Fai sometimes attaches nonsense sounds to the ends of names, as if they were the polite titles like -chan (young girl), -kun (young boy), -san (respectful), -sensei (teacher), etc. However, Fai's "titles" don't have any meaning other than to make fun of the person he's referring to. Examples include -pon, -puri, -tan, and sometimes even -ponpon.

Ioryogi is a spirit who rebelled against Heaven and was punished by being turned into a plush toy dog. His three companions were turned into a white cuckoo bird with a red hat, a big, dark brown bear who has a Baumkuchen (German layer cake) shop in the woods ("Bear's Baumkuchen"), and a silver fox-like creature who stands on his hind legs and has a scar across one eye. The fox-like creature is named Ginsei, but I can't remember the other two's names.

The "war" Kariya referred to when telling his story is called the "Holy Grail War" in the Fate/Zero universe. In this "war", seven people are selected by the grail from around the world to fight. They can battle in any way they want, whether outright in honorable combat, or sneakily through assassination—whether in groups or individually. The people competing in the war each summon a "servant" from the past, whose life is maintained through the magic of the competitors (so the competitors have to be either mages or have some other source of magic). A servant is a heroic figure from the past, whose soul is literally revived in order to fight in the war, though he/she is also given some special power. Examples of servants from Fate/Zero were Alexander the Great, King Arthur, Lancelot (Kariya's servant), and Gilgamesh (a king from ancient Babylonian mythology). Each servant is also given a designation based on their special power: Alexander was "Rider", King Arthur was "Saber", Lancelot was "Berserker", and Gilgamesh was "Archer". The servants were the real historical people, but they were bound to their mages, and the mages each had three "command spells" that they could use in case there was some philosophical or moral difference and they needed to force their servant to do something. In the first picture of Kariya and Sakura, the red marks on his hand represent his three command spells.

The reason people compete in this Holy Grail War is because whoever wins is said to be granted one wish for anything at all in the world. The deal Zouken made with Kariya was that he would take the wish, but Kariya would be able to take Sakura home.

Kariya did not know the identity of his servant because an extra spell was added onto Berserker by Zouken, making Berserker insane and giving him more power. Berserker's face was always covered, so Kariya never learned that he was Sir Lancelot.

Rin, Sakura, and Sakura's husband Shirou all fought in a Holy Grail War when they were young adults. Rin decided to use her magic keep her servant Rider alive after the war was over because they had become friends. That's why Mokona lists four people living together as a family. Unfortunately, I don't know anything about Rider except that she's a girl. I also know next to nothing about the Holy Grail War that Sakura fought in.

In the Matou household, Sakura was despised, shunned, used, and looked down upon, even though she was being used as the magical heir to suit their purposes. She was also repeatedly raped and abused by Kariya's brother's son (Kariya's nephew by blood). I don't know exactly how she escaped, but it seems to me that the Matou household still exists in that world, perhaps even including Zouken Matou (who has some sort of immortality spell on him through the worms). If Kariya ends up in the Fate/Zero world again, he may have to do something to avoid being discovered by the Matou family. He might also have to come to terms with the fact that Sakura was raped because he hadn't been able to save her the first time.

Christianity and Catholicism exist in the Fate/Zero universe, though Kariya's religion was never mentioned.

The Fate/Zero universe is basically Earth with magic added in. The competitors in the Holy Grail war came from Japan (Kariya), Germany (Emiya Kiritsugu), England (Alexander the Great's master), and Italy (Gilgamesh's master).

Gilgamesh and his master Kirei were the ones who actually murdered Sakura's father, and they were the ones who set it up so that Kariya would find him dead and Aoi would walk in on him. Kirei is an apostate Catholic priest who reads the Bible and pretends to be a Christian, but who was corrupted by the Babylonian king Gilgamesh to love death and destruction. He's probably dead by the time Sakura has her happy ending, but he and Gilgamesh were both alive at the end of Fate/Zero. Kirei is relevant because he became Rin's adoptive father and Aoi's caretaker after Tokiomi died. Rin hated him and was suspicious of him from the beginning.

Kobato's universe is also basically Earth—specifically Japan.

Unlike in Fate/Zero, Christianity is never mentioned in Kobato. However, there is a sovereign, personal God who commands angels in Heaven (Tenkai), and there is a Hell (Jigoku) where demons live. There is also a separate "spirit world" with spirits who are capable of sinning like people, but who are also invisible and powerful.

Reincarnation exists in both the Kobato and Fate/Zero universes.

**People not well-described in Part One:** Sakura as a young adult has long hair that reaches down to her back, but she still wears the red ribbon Rin gave her.

Rin has long, brown hair that's tied on ponytails on either side of her head, and I think she has blue eyes like her father. She has a very fiery, determined personality.

Shirou Emiya (Sakura's husband) has short, flame-orange hair and brown eyes, and he's a slim, young man. His adoptive father was Kiritsugu Emiya, who fought in the Holy Grail War that Kariya fought in. From what I know, Shirou is a mature and principled young man who inherited his father's strong, idealistic morals. He was rescued by Kiritsugu in a massive disaster that destroyed a city at the end of Fate/Zero. Kiritsugu was responsible for the disaster (though he had done it to save more lives than were lost), but he was digging desperately through the wreckage, trying to rescue people. Shirou recalls that when Kiritsugu found him, "He looked at me as if he was the one who had been saved, rather than me." I think Kiritsugu is dead by the time Sakura and Shirou are married, but I don't know how he died.

If you want to bring in the other Travelers who are with Fai and Mokona, their names are Syaoran and Kurogane.

Syaoran is a short, young man with big, brown eyes and brown hair. He's somewhat quiet, kind, thoughtful, and hopeful. His purpose in traveling between universes is to search for his beloved's memories, which were scattered in different universes. His beloved also happens to be named Sakura, but she's a young woman with sandy-blonde hair and green eyes. By the time Syaoran comes to Kobato's universe, I believe his Sakura is back home in his universe, though in the past she used to travel with them.

Kurogane is a tall, muscular warrior with black hair and a terrible temper. He fights with a spear, which he's extremely skilled at, and he hates Fai and Mokona because of their lack of seriousness. He travels between universes because he was banished from his universe by his beloved (who's a queen) for reasons unknown to him, and he's trying to find his way back to her.

Fai is traveling between universes because he's running away from something, but he's secretive as to exactly what that is. He loves to make fun of "Kuro-pon" and get on his nerves.

When it's time for the Travelers to go to another universe, Mokona has a pale blue earring that begins to glow brightly. She then rises into the air, white angel-wings sprouting from her back, and opens her mouth wide. She basically "inhales" the three people and then vanishes into the next universe.

**Important Information:** To gain the ability to travel between universes with Mokona, each of the Travelers had to give up what was most important to them. For Syaoran, that meant he would be missing from all the memories he retrieved for his beloved—so she wouldn't remember all the times they had spent together.

Ioryogi can travel freely between the spirit world (Ikai) and the human world (Ningenkai)

There also exists a messenger from Heaven named Ushagi-san, who takes the form of a white rabbit with little wings. Ushagi-san floats down from the sky holding a flower (the kind varies), and is able to communicate with Ioryogi by pointing the flower at his chest. Ushagi-san doesn't speak, but she does give out an echoing giggle and a sound of bells on the wind when she appears.

Ushagi-san


End file.
